Emergency Gadget

With a number of natural disasters hitting Japan lately, my wife decided that we needed to do some better preparation in case something happened in our area. While I agreed that was an excellent idea, I also knew that it would likely become a Hello Kitty Hell nightmare. Since my wife has already bought us Hello Kitty fire extinguishers, I wasn’t sure I really wanted to know what else she would find in her preparation of our safety. It didn’t take long before she decided we both needed one of these:

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

Hello Kitty has decided that the world needs a high tech version of the Swiss army knife for a generation that has more important things to do than open a can in an emergency. What is a person to do if their cell phone battery dies?

Sanrio’s solution is to create a 126 gram emergency gadget that does the following for the high tech world we live in:

1. USB cell phone recharger

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

2. LED Flashlight

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

3. AM/FM radio

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

4. hazard siren

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

5. compass

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

It can also be used with a 9v battery

Hello Kitty emergency gadget

Of course, my wife feels that it is not only necessary for her to carry one of these around, but I should also carry one in case of an emergency.

wife: “Hello Kitty will always be there to save you!”

me: … (thinking: this must be part of the Hello Kitty Hell conspiracy – instead of letting me just die and putting me out of my misery, Hello Kitty will come to my rescue so that I have to endure more Hello Kitty Hell to the point of trying to commit suicide, where once again Hello Kitty will come to the rescue and we’ll start all over again…)

I have to say that there really is nothing more unmanly than going into a store and taking the change out of your pocket to pay for something, and have a Hello Kitty gadget flop out on the counter. The store clerk looks at the gadget, then looks at you, then looks back at the gadget, then again at you with a look of “are you some kind of pervert?” It doesn’t matter how hard you try to explain the reason you have it, anything you say just makes you look more pathetic…

I think that I Hello Kitty Hell will be more bearable if I take my chances of an untimely death rather than continue to carry this around…

33 thoughts on “Emergency Gadget

  1. Hehe, i love your site! I only just found in two days ago but i went back and read all your archives, some hello kitty accessories i don’t mind, but this? No thanks. I don’t mind the colour pink either buut I saw a picture of not your bathroom but another hello kitty fan and the pink made me feel queezy…


  2. Did anyone collect the Garbage Pale Kids cards when they were at school? (That dementedly sick spoof of the cabbage patch kids). Maybe a series called Goodbye Kitty is in order; getting brutalised or interfered with by a dog, suffering from some form of nasty tape worm that sort of thing.
    Just an idea.

    Keith, Scotland

  3. Oh OK, sorry. Yes it was my first time here. πŸ™‚ (I followed the link from engadget like you guessed) I will know not to ask again. Thank you anyway. I find your blog really amusing and will surely be reading it in the future.

  4. Pingback: Jennie S. Bev’s bits of life » Hello Kitty Girl: Emergency Gadget
  5. wow I like hello kitty as much as the next girl but your wife’s hello kitty obsession is a bit extreme you poor guy.

  6. I must say, I am sooooo jealous of your wife right now. She lives in Hello Kitty heaven, so much so, I’m begging my husband to find work in Japan! I think your wife should post a blog of her own so that she can pass along the info on where to buy this and all items Hello Kitty. Yes, she would be contributing to the crazies like me, but hey, at least we are happy!

  7. i truly think that i am jealous of your wife. i love hello kitty but carrying that thing around would be hello kitty hell.

  8. ( β€œare you some kind of pervert?” )
    OMG I laughed so hard when I read this! The whole scene you decribed was hilarious!

  9. This was just tooooo funny!! Hello Kitty is not something I would really like to have a pillow made out of, but THIS?! That’s insane.

  10. i love this is wonderful i wish i knew where to get one and anything else hello kitty there isn’t many places to find hello kitty in texas where i live

  11. honestly,

    i am not at all a big fan of hello kitty… and i am definitely not a big fan of pink,
    but that item seems like a pretty useful one to have around.

  12. Hi,

    One of my friends went to Japan recently and got me one of these… since I cannot read Japanese, what is the feature with the laptop? How does it help connected to a laptop? Can you help me? Thanks in advanced! =]

  13. i love hello kitty :D!
    im not sure i’ll be needing one of these..
    but, the idea is amazing πŸ™‚
    i think everyone in danger should have a little ‘hello kitty care’ ;D

  14. Hay guys omg this like totally amazing its like omg innit i just like totally want it man coz its like well cool innit ye! seeyaa guys

  15. we love Hello Kitty but we hate the battery!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  16. LMAO! your soooooo hilarious! I think they didn’t put a knife on that thing cause it would be to easy for Hello Kitty Haters to slit their wrists if they were ever forced to carry one!
    BTW, I soooooooo wanna get one of these!

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