Hello Kitty Swarovski Crystal Covered Bike

It’s when I receive emails like this that I know it’s really going to be a Hello Kitty Hell day. I’ve noticed a growing trend of Hello Kitty fanatics modding their stuff so that they can have the only (and most expensive) of that certain kind of item. Thus it was not a surprise (although it still made me want to run to the toilet) when this arrived in me email box:

Hello Kitty bike

Hello Kitty bike

Hello Kitty bike

I’m not sure what it is with Hello Kitty and Swarovski crystals, but this is definitely a Hello Kitty fanatic thing (see my wife’s modded cell phone). I think that Sanrio and Swarovski have secretly teamed up after discovering some special region of the brain in Hello Kitty fanatics which goes into overdrive when the two are combined while the rest of us normal folks are left staring at stinging bling that makes us want to cut our eyes out because doing so would be less painful.

What’s worse is the Hello Kitty fanatic is totally proud of this monstrosity:

I got the most expensive Hello Kitty bike on the planet! I spent one year covering my Hello Kitty bike in Swarovski crystals. Literally thousands of dollars were spent and it has approximately 50,000 crystals on it.

Yep, that pretty well sums up a Hello Kitty fanatic. Of course, my wife loves it. “It shines and sparkles bringing Hello Kitty brightness wherever she goes. Isn’t that wonderful?” I was tempted to answer, but decided that now that winter is here, it’s no fun to sleep alone on the couch in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag…

Sent in by Dottie who should have the the good fortune to have this pimped out contraption stolen, but who is safe with it because I can’t imagine that anyone (including the worst criminal elements) would ever want to be seen with something like that…

53 thoughts on “Hello Kitty Swarovski Crystal Covered Bike

  1. Why is it that you feel it necessary to insult everyone who sends you photos? They are helping your blog and in your pettiness, all you do is rant about how much you don’t like it. Are you not manly enough to show appreciation to others? Are you so insecure in your own manliness that you can’t properly thank people for making your blog better? In all honesty, this blog would suck without all the photos that people send you. You rely on them for your popularity and then turn around and insult them.

    This person put in a lot of effort and money into this project because she love Hello Kitty and wants to spread that love with others. You are the only one that can’t see the beauty behind it.

    Like I said before, your mean spirited attitude is going to come back and haunt you. We are all only willing to put up with so much before we revolt and boycott this blog.

  2. Never underestimate the black market, Mr. HKH. Especially considering what Swarovski crystals may cost alone.

    One good thing about a crystal-studded bike is the fact that the person riding it won’t need reflectors at night. I’d like to see the Swarovski-studded helmet that goes with this thing. XD

  3. Darlene “This person put in a lot of effort and money into this project because she love Hello Kitty and wants to spread that love with others”
    How does a person “spread love” with a crystal covered bike? That’s stupid!
    Mr.HKH I completely agree with you! Great blog, I’m still laughing. Keep it up. Lol. You too Darlene you have me laughing more with every comment.

  4. Brace yourselves for a shock folks. Darlene has said something I agree with!! This blog would be nothing without the DIY fan submissions.

    However, to send a photo of your HK tattoo or blinged up cheap bicycle to a site called “Hello Kitty Hell”, and not expect abuse from the site owner is called stupidity I think!

  5. darlene: “Like I said before, your mean spirited attitude is going to come back and haunt you”

    were you refering to yourself? LOL

  6. Okay, I think I just drowned in my own pool of drool… gah… soooo pretty…..

    I wouldn’t want to ride it though, all the crystals would fall off….

  7. It’s the Oooo Shiny! gene. It short-circuits the brain straight to the wallet. “It’s sparkly! It’s cute!” they think upon seeing it, and immediately they can’t think about anything else.

    On a positive note, you could probably cheat on your wife, tell her about it, and then give her something as sparkly as this bike, and she’d completely forget about the cheating thing.

  8. I like this – pretty kitty bling bling. Not that I’d personally ever spend that kind of money. Apparently someone has more money than they know what to do with.

  9. Who the what the huh? Who would spend as she put “literally thousands of dollars” into that. Sure its sparkly, sure it has crystals….but theres more to being aesthetically pleasing than being covered in sparkling crystals. Then the Hello Kitty aspect makes it even worse.

    I hate to say this but people please, a small amount of diamonds or crystals on say a ring is good, but covering the entirety of a bike is not. Its not “pretty” its not “love filled” its more blinding and gaudy than anything else. This is one of those “too much of a good thing” moments. Even though Hello Kitty itself takes any “good” out of the entire project.

  10. I disagree, I think this site would work just fine without fan submissions. There’s plenty of people who post this stuff online. I’m sure if this is on youtube Mr. HKH could find it . . . not that he’d want to. >.<

    Also I love how the fans say they’ll revolt. Isn’ that a good thing?

    I personally think the insults are funny and frankly if I sent him a HKH object and he did the same to me I’d laugh my ass off.

    On the note of the actual bike. How could they ride it? It might get dirty! One of the crystals could fall off and decrease it’s ever so important shiney value! Oh noes!

  11. Finally something HK that isn’t pink… and it has to be beyond stupid. Why?

    Do you think Darlene will ever understand that this is a site to knock Hello Kitty? Or that when people send in these pictures as HK fans they are pretty much increasing HKH’s HK Hell therefore leaving themselves open to be mocked on this site? She has to be the slowest person ever.

  12. I don’t have much to say about the bike, per se; it’s just sparkly. But jeezus, do I wish I had that kind of cash to screw around with. If I had a few thou extra, I wouldn’t be pimping my bicycle, I’d be buying a car.

  13. I like how Terato thinks, you’ve got a point. If you’re going to spend that kind of money, why not spend it on something cool… Like a car, or a Guitar….with that kind of money I’d be getting myself a Les Paul…….with my luck someones going to Hello Kitty a Les and my brain will explode…..

  14. Perfect example of how the supposedly all-love-and-lightness Hello Kitty has corrupted people into doing stupid, pointless, wasteful things.

    This gal spent literally thousands of dollars on crystals. Imagine how many homeless people that could feed, or the meds you could buy for someone with bipolar disorder. Imagine the food that could buy for a no-kill shelter, or the donations that could have been made for medical research into incurable diseases.

    But no. She spent it all on BLING on an ugly bike. Because it’s Hello Kitty.

    Perfect proof that Hello Kitty is evil.

  15. darlene said: “We are all only willing to put up with so much before we revolt and boycott this blog.”

    Shut up, darlene, just shut it. And stop thinking that you speak for the rest of us, because you most definitely DON’T.

  16. “Sent in by Dottie who should have the the good fortune to have this pimped out contraption stolen, but who is safe with it because I can’t imagine that anyone (including the worst criminal elements) would ever want to be seen with something like that…”

    That’s why you sell it on Ebay and post the listing here, silly!


    Darlene, that fact that he insults everyone is what makes the blog funny. What can we say, Masochists R Us. Why else would there be a hello kitty S&M room?

  18. shadowdragon said:
    “This gal spent literally thousands of dollars on crystals. Imagine how many homeless people that could feed, …”

    You know, it is kind of surprise even to myself but I disagree with what he said. I’m not a HK fan. I don’t think I want to have the bike with crystal.

    But What he said reminds me the story in Bible (Anointing of Jesus).
    Life needs something special, something beyond money.

    The bicycle is definitely special. If that brightens her life, I think it’s all worth it. I hope nobody steals the treasure from her.

  19. I am a cycling fan, and an appreciator of good engineering. I’m specifically not saying that you shouldn’t have something special, to make it beautiful to live.

    That, however, is a blinged-up cheap shopping bike; spending half the money on a bespoke touring bike or road racer is getting something beautiful for your money.

  20. HA! One wrong bump and the bike is destroyed but a car running it over. That or nature sets it the bike never gets used and rusts over. lol

  21. Pretty bike but would she ride it?

    Its not a waste of money to have something special that makes you happy.

    But if shes blinged out this bike with “literally thousands of dollars” and won’t ride it for fear that a crystal will fall off or it will get dirty, then, thats an awful waste.

  22. Oh dear God?! I love HK (have commented before) but as an owner of 5 bikes, cannot fathom this POS. My SO (whom brought this site to my attention) is a bike mechanic – bt us, we have 13 bikes…and not one has a sticker of HK (amazing)… I’ll be sure to send this to him (Marine reservs. on active duty heading for Iraq) for a good laugh.


  23. Darlene,
    What the hell is up with your knocking the poor webmaster?
    If you don’t like his site, Shut the hell up and mosey on your merry little way…

  24. Darlene… STFU. If you are so pissed about HKH do not visit it. Are you really that much of a idiot to not realize that a site called “Hello Kitty Hell” is not going to bash Hello Kitty? Trust me a one person boycott would not make a difference, in fact if you were to boycott HKH it would make alot of people happy.

    Anyway… I’m not a Hello Kitty fanatic, but this bike is pretty cool. It makes me want to go out and get a beach cruiser and start decorating it with all of the Swarovski crystals I have sitting in my craft room.

  25. LOL!
    *Wipes tear from eye*
    That bike has made the world such a, such a special, special place. Let’s ride it on a world tour around the world and make the magic take flight!

    But seriously, snaps to whoever made it, that’s a freakin’ awesome piece of work. If the Artist ever brought it in, all my friends and I would melt. We’re not Hello Kitty fans but we are art students and we’d really appreciate the time and effort that took to make.


    P.S, I am not siding with Darlene.

  26. The treads on that look dangerous… Seriously… They won’t grip the road very well… Meaning it won’t stop as guickly or turn as well… Meaning… “Somebody gonna get a hurt REAL bad!”

  27. Wow, I’m not usually into bling but I’d totally buy and ride this. I’d also wear a white fedora adorned with ostrich feathers, white spats, and a zoot suit while referring to everyone as my “bitches.”

  28. i just stumbled upon this site and i think it’s hilarious !
    i’m a HK fan and drive an F150 truck (with total HK package of course). My nephews refuse to ride in it and are insulted that i’ve “desecrated” a Ford pick-up with HK seat covers, steering wheel cover, floor mats, etc.
    it’s only a fun thing. get over it, people ! HK is not going to save the world or make it a better place. stop bashing the webmaster and get a clue…and a sense of humor !

  29. I just don’t even know what to say!
    My 6 year old daughter would die for it, my 18 year old daughter would run over it and my 30 year old best friend would most likely buy 2 of them and ride them both. (WHILE wearing the fedora and crap as mentioned above)

  30. I am iN lOvE with this *BiKe*!! I hAvE a cUsToMiZeD ~PiNk~ HeLLo KiTTy bEaCh cRuIsEr… AnD I LOVE iT.. BuT this oNe is mUcH mOrE aMaZiNg 🙂

  31. hey bike is cute and super pretty but what kind of kacass would want to sit here for 5 hours rinstoning a hello kitty bike that will reut up spme day …………… no point

  32. I love the pink Hello Kitty bike, I dream of owning it (this coming from a girl who has thousands of dollars in carbon road and triathlon bikes). I would love to pedal around the park looking like a total dork on my pink Hello Kitty. That being said I’ve just about peed myself laughing while reading your comentary. I love your site!!!!!

  33. Whoa.. That is epic…. I don’t know whether I should be amazed that the person who did this spent so much cash to buy these crystals and the time she spent on putting them on the bike or amazed that I watched the whole youtube video, without cringing or blinking

  34. OH MY. i think i just fell in love! I don’t know what it is about that cat, but she’s got me woooooped!!! i want everything and anything that has her on it! HOW MUCH FOR THAT MIKE?! i loove it!

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