Hello Kitty Tuxedo

It is amazing that week after week, when I somehow imagine that the worst of Hello Kitty has already found its way into our house and that things can not get worse (I know, I should know by now that it can always get worse, but all I have is hope…), it gets worse…much, much worse. There isn’t much that sends shivers down my spine these days, but this pretty much brings to the forefront the worst of my Hello Kitty Hell nightmares – a Hello Kitty tuxedo:

Hello Kitty tuxedo

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Hello Kitty Nightmare Photo

You know that game where you concentrate on some serene scene or maze and then all of a sudden a scary figure jumps out and scares the bejesuses out of you?

Well, that’s basically how I feel when I open my email from Hello Kitty fanatics (except I cry afterward instead of laugh). The latest in the long series that has done this to me was this photo:

Hello Kitty nightmare photo

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Hello Kitty Mosquito Repellent Patch

The hot and humid days of summer are now in full force in Japan and that means having to deal with all the lovely mosquitoes. If you decide to go on a picnic and hike like we did this past weekend, it makes sense to take mosquito repellent with you. To my regret, I made the amateurish assumption that when I asked my wife to pack the mosquito repellent that it would be normal spray or cream mosquito repellent. I should have known better living in Hello Kitty Hell that assuming is always a bad thing to do. Thus, I was introduced to the Hello Kitty mosquito repellent patch:

Hello Kitty mosquito repellant patch

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Hello Kitty Ukulele

It has been well established that Hello Kitty fanatics don’t need to have any use for a Hello Kitty product to still lust after it and decide that they need to add it to their collection. My wife doesn’t play any musical instrument, but that has not stopped her from collecting a small symphony of music related items.

The other day I was digging through our closet looking for my baseball glove (which fortunately, is not something that they currently make in a Hello Kitty pattern at Sanrio, but I have no doubt they are already planning to release a line) when I came across a Hello Kitty ukulele:

Hello Kitty ukulele

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Hello Kitty toothpick

The thing about living in Hello Kitty Hell is that you can never make a simple request and not have the evil feline right there to haunt you. You would assume that if you asked your significant other if they could hand you a toothpick, you would get a normal wood toothpick. Not in Hello Kitty Hell. I asked my wife if she could hand me a toothpick after dinner last night and she actually handed me Hello Kitty toothpicks:

Hello Kitty angel toothpick

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Hello Kitty Antivirus and Firewall Software

You knew that this day would come. Not only does Hello Kitty want to sell you computers (such as this, this and this) in her evil feline image, she now also wants to protect your computer from the inside as well with her new Hello Kitty antivirus and firewall software (while it is currently only available in Chinese, you know it’s only a matter of time…):

Helo Kitty antivirus software

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