Hello Kitty Mail

Some random Hello Kitty mail that has made its way into my email box:

I enjoy reading your blog, and I think it’s even more funny that you are helping hello kitty fanatics find more ideas of things to buy.

I have an honest question. I am 25 yrs, I don’t quite think of myself in a “midlife crisis” (unless I live to 50, of course) but why is it that I have become so obsessed with Sanrio and Hello Kitty as I have gotten older?

You know that adrenaline, butterflies in the stomach feeling of nervousness and excitement? Well, even a walk through a Target store, I will go in with intentions on purchasing a simple household cleaning item and walk out with a hello kitty trash can, laundry hamper, stickers, pillow, lamp, soap dispenser (which is still brand new in the back of my closet because I live in my boyfriends house and have no place to put it) stack of notebooks, folders (I am out of school) convection oven (which my poor boyfriend actually ended up using a couple times until he said it didn’t cook food bc it wasn’t meant to make real food!) and pretty much anything with her face on it. I remember as a kid liking hello kitty but mostly other kids things like disney, looney toons, barbie, etc. (actually , I only liked keroppi at the time because my favorite color used to be green). Anyways, I havent’ yet figured out why I get so “giddy” when I see anything Hello Kitty. My boyfriend has been supportive and hasn’t complained as of yet. He has gotten me the jewelry neiman marcus with hello kitty for birthdays and christmas, but I guess because he knows ANYTHING will make me happy, even if it’s a 99 cent eraser in the shape of her head…

Right now I still get the “oh it’s cute” factor, and seem to “pull it off” but I know once I hit 30, I might have to tone things down, but lately it’s become an obsession. Would you say my issue is pretty common with other girls/women my age? Is it associated with the fear of aging? How long does it last? Or will I get worse? I don’t even recall having any hello kitty during my high school or even early college years! I wish you could put a poll on your page which would show the size of age groups of the average hello kitty fan –Kim H.

Give all your future boyfriends a Hello Kitty gun (any will do) and let them put themselves out of their misery on day one…

Dear Wretched Victim of Sanrio-Decreed Fortune:

As one of the audience to your torment, I have the need to tell you that it stirs both amusement and empathy in me. The fact that I am (and countless others are) entertained by your ‘Hello Kitty Hell’ is evidence to humankind’s inherent sadism. This was obvious anyway because the Hello Kitty Universe was spawned from the foulest trenches of the human psyche.

But while I am empathetic for your plight, I am even more intrigued of the never-ending flow of products that have been tainted by such an abomination. This worries me a bit…more than a bit…quite a lot really. I can’t decide whether it is some sort of morbid fascination or a masochistic streak that has been recently unearthed or perhaps a primitive survival instinct that has been similarly discovered in face of a great adversary or the fact that I have a need to stare the most horrific divisions of reality in the face to prove I can. I would bet that it’s all of that combined, though any sort of fascination associated with the Corrupt-Cuddly-Pink-Aura-Rapist-of-Sanity is probably something I will need to scour from my soul before it is further blemished.

Well I doubt that’ll happen because it really isn’t some paranoid delusion that she is EVERYWHERE so I might as well remain ‘as one of the audience to your torment’ if only to provide some measure of sustenance to my sadism (and masochism) and possibly cling to sanity for a moment longer. I offer my condolences, my respect, and my laughs. Adieu — Kamara

I become more convinced over time that Hello Kitty Hell is like a car wreck. You know that you don’t want to look, you tell yourself not to look, you vow not to slow down to look and then you do anyway and gawk at the wreckage and horror and then quickly look away – which in this case just happens to be me life…

Dearest KittyHell Blogger,

I am writing to thank you for the small ray of sunshine your witty, righteous anger-fueled blogging brings my work days, and to tell you of a Hello Kitty experience I had, that might make you smile.

I work at a mechanics in Sydney. We have a notable percentage of Asian customers, all of which are always very amenable, if not some a little difficult to understand at times. Sometimes a conversation can go like this:

“Sam, its Kim Wong on the phone”
“Which Kim wong?”
“Asian Kim Wong”
“Is she like, English as a first language Asian, or Hello Kitty Asian?”

Its never derogative, just descriptive.

This term obviously springs from the Asian customers we have that generally drive VW golfs or Smartcars, and the ENTIRE car has been kittyafied. The first time I saw this phenomena, I was rather
impressed that they’d actually managed to cover every surface with Hello Kitty paraphernalia, but did have that queasy feeling in my stomach that you often describe, and which I feel most times I see
Hello Kitty products. However, on entering the car to move it into the workshop, I discovered that a kitty-covered-car can actually give a Hello Kitty Hater a rare chance for some ironic revenge.

You climb into the car, you sit on Hello Kitty’s’ face. You grab the steering wheel- and hello Kitty gets a quick slap across the whiskers. You put your grease and oil covered boot down, on Kittys face, and
grab another Hello Kitty with your left hand, to wrench it into gear. The Hello Kitty air freshener smacks its head against the windscreen every time you turn a corner, and you can even open the ashtray to put a cigarette out in Hello Kittys’ eye. So whilst a nausea (akin to car sickness) kicks in as you are
surrounded by so much pink kittyness, one is able to smile a small smile at the grease mark left on Hello Kitty’s’ head.

Thank you for continued blogging, I hope this email returns a smile from the many your have give me. –Bell

Yes, the ironic revenge stage lasts a few weeks until you realise that your entire life is filled with Hello Kitty and reality is there is nothing be Hello Kitty Hell…

I assume, (or fervently hope) that you get letters like this all the time. Probably an annoying amount of them. I don’t even expect you to read even this far into this, but I’ve made a fool out of myself for far, far less than this.

I have two nieces that were recently introduced to Hello Kitty. One is a tomboy, and so went right back to trying to figure out how to climb the tree that she’s not supposed to be anywhere near. The other is an adorable child, with a purple room and a pink bed and bows in her hair. She wants a Hello Kitty plushie thing and a backpack and shoes and God only knows what else for Christmas. And I just wrote to tell you that I’m forwarding your site to her mother in the hopes that the absurdity that is Hello Kitty will convince her not to start down this path.

So I just wrote to say thank you. Thank you very much, on behalf of the poor bastard that will marry my niece someday far, far in the future. You may just have saved him from his own Hello Kitty Hell. Sincerely –Chrissa Bennett

He definitely owes me a case of beer.

55 thoughts on “Hello Kitty Mail”

  1. Let’s go in order here:

    – You get more obssesed with HK when you grow older because…. YOU HAVE MONEY!!!! reaching adulthood sometimes comes with something called a Job…. so… instead of wasting your money in lunch at school… so waste it in HK stuff… And you dont have any other responsible adult saying “WHY THE HELL DID YOU BUY THAT CRAP WITH MY MONEY!!!”

    – This blog is at the same time a Haven and a Hell for Kitty haters…. HKH is now one of the infernal planes in a D&D campaign im playing…. all for showing the DM this site.

    – Sydney has kittyfied cars… another reason to go and live there… besides the fact that they need ppl to work there and that i have relatives…

    – Yay for tomboys!!!!

    Reply
  2. This blog is far more entertaining than a lot of of carp out there an always has a way to bring a small smile to my face. I’m just glad they are letter of support and not letters demanding to know where to get all these lovely pieces of rubbish.

    I do have to state that the main thing that I dislike about HK fanatics is their ability to add to the mass amounts of carp in the land fills once their precious and kawaii item has broken or grown old. Disgusting really….

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  3. Nobody cares about the email you get and your stupid comments to them. The only reason anyone visits this blog is to see the photos. You would think that you had learned this by now. Why don’t you just put up photos and make us all a lot happier than having to read through these all written posts? You should have more respect for those of us that are making you popular.

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  4. Lol from the first one: “Would you say my issue is pretty common with other girls/women my age?”

    No… you’re a freak.

    And @ Malik
    I think she was takin them for a while while she wasn’t posting. Then apparently she only had enough money for HK or meds, so she chose HK.

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  5. [Comic Book Guy] BEST POST EVER!!! [/end] 😀

    I’m kind of jealous of Kim H, cos she has an SO who can afford Needless Markup!!

    Lucy, that is one brilliant idea for a D&D plane. 🙂 You could expand it all sorts of ways too, like, say, a Pokemon plane, and I have several other ideas too. If you want some of them, email me!!

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  6. I’m 35 and I can tell you why I like Hello Kitty. It doesn’t have anything to do with mid-life crisis or too much money. It’s me allowing myself to be soft so to speak. Growing up was harsh and the environment was hard. I had a hard outer shell to protect myself and well pink was girly and vulnerable. I also had an older brother whose clothes I had to wear out of necessity. Ironically, I’m not the only person like this. I’ve seen my younger cousin soften up and like pink as she grows older.

    I wouldn’t say that I’m obsessed. I realize that I have to be picky with my HK purchases or I will have a house full of HK over time. For some reason I don’t think it’s a phase and I don’t understand why it brings me happiness. Possibly it’s the simplicity. I read that HK doesn’t have a mouth because she smiles from the heart. How freakin’ corny is that?

    Recently, I was at the mall in a Sanrio store and a person came out dressed as HK and I became excited as if I had just seen a celebrity. Her head was freakishly large and it looked like the furry head had been kept in storage for years. Did I care? No. My heart raced and I nearly pushed over a six year old girl to have my picture taken. Seriously? My logic was telling me that this was some sixteen year old was getting paid $5.65 and hour dressing up in a fur suit and I’m giddy. I guess you do what it takes to make you happy but man, even I have to say I sure did feel stupid. But it didn’t stop me from showing off my picture of me and my blurry picture of Hello Kitty. Heck no.

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  7. Shannon, there’s a difference between having a “kiddy hobby” and getting fun out of a character in a suit, like you describe, and “having to have HK everything” like this blog is about.

    In short, you’re a well-balanced adult with a fun hobby. So am I, but mine is Science Fiction.

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  8. I was 6 when HK hit my scene. I have always found her adorably cute. My mom would take me to Lord and Taylor to buy her little pencils and notebooks, etc… I too, see all that cute HK stuff in the stores. I only buy select things I can use. Actually it’s all jewelry. (All the other stuff would clash with the decor in my home and would bug the hell out of me) I can undersatand how a 30 something like myself would find her adorable and get happy when they see her. It’s just that everyone has different levels of “interest”. No matter what your age is.

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  9. Well, those e-mails are actually pretty interesting! And that comment about, “He definitely owes me a case of beer.”
    …Priceless. xD

    @darlene,
    Woah, take a chill pill. He just showed some emails and what he said about them.
    I think someone lost their medication! *gasp* Well, we’ll help you find them! Won’t we? =D

    @moriyah, epic win. xD

    Reply
  10. I was around 5-6 when I got my first HK toy: a mini gum dispenser from Bob Evans (the ones with the store attached).
    It was bad having an FAO Schwartz in the area because I was always there!
    I actually ‘met’ HK once when I was 20. I think.
    I was fresh from surgery and my mom took me there to cheer me up and lo and behold it was the 25th anniversary and she was there… I’ll have to scan the picture for ya’ll! (Oh, yeah I said “ya’ll”!)
    I got a sweet French Angel double faced watch there.
    It has genuine leather straps and sterling silver parts.
    It’s so pretty!

    To Kim H:
    I’ll be 29 this week and my HK love has grown, yes it does get worse once you start being able to buy it yourself… but once you get older the little voice in your head called ‘reason’ starts to prevail more and more.
    You start asking yourself: “Do I really need this since I already have a non-HK version?”
    Plus little pesky things like bills interfere 😉

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  11. PS: Target has the most adorable Halloween HK stickers..
    (I bought them yesterday, couldn’t resist) It’s HK in different little costumes…. Super cute.

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  12. at first I thought it was HK mall, not mail… I was like woo hoo… hahaha There is a new store @ my mall it’s Couture Hello Kitty. It’s fabulous, its a big girls HK store.
    Heavenly, just heavenly. I’ve already cleaned them out!

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  13. Actually since we’re on the subject i’d like to take a moment to thank you for curing my HK addiction. It used to be i’d *squee* and skip over to the pink display case or the sanrio store like an addict offered free heroin. but after i started reading this blog it made me question WHY i was doing that. i started looking at things with logic and reason and now i hardly have to take a deep breath to walk right past the bubblegum pink displays. and thankfully the cure was implemented before i had more than one box of the stuff. I still enjoy it but i’m not obsessed any more. i want to thank you for saving me from a life where i blew all my cash on HK and ended up with nothing but pink crap. and i’m sure my boyfriend would thank you too, if he only knew.

    ~K

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  14. Kim H.
    Asking Mr HKH about Hello Kitty obsession is like asking an Atheist how to be a better bible believing fundamentalist Christian. Try asking Hello Kitty Junkies. I cannot add much because I am a guy. I would deal with it differently: I probable never get a date (If wanted one in the first place). I was a girl I most likely say embrace the kitty or I am playing Ray Charles on ya (Hit the Road Jack)

    Kamara
    In anther time you would be the type who go to freak shows just to act self righteous like “I glad I not one of those freaks”. Ditto with Bell.

    Chrissa
    As you see, no two persons are the same. They most likely will grow out of it some will become life long fans. Just ramie them to be finically responsible in spite if they do become obsessed fans.

    MR HKH
    Hell in you case is a product of your own mind.

    Reply
  15. LOL… I agree w/ wring on the better hello kitty than bratz.
    Which are FAR MORE annoying. HK is still cute but I don’t know.
    Some people may go overboard with it. I think I’ve already reconsidered mybowling ball purchase (that only backs it up considering i don’t want to pay 2oi3492384723894 dolalrs for it! with drilling!)

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  16. @Kamara
    “Corrupt-Cuddly-Pink-Aura-Rapist-of-Sanity”

    Wow, those are very good words to put together.

    I will say that HK for me was introduced by her evil sister My Melody. Also, I had friends that were from Japan anyway. Their family opened up a sushi bar. They had tons of that stuff around their house because they were both girls.

    Anyways, I like HK (TO A POINT) because she to me markets in a Wharholian type way (before he sucked and wrote shitty films) with Campbell’s soup cans. I kind of like it from an artistic point of view because they have such simple forms making into a character that people can enjoy, fight over, and have weird fantasies about. (Well, maybe not the wierd fantasy part, but it is intruiging nonetheless.)

    And yes, she is cute. I sort of am drawn to that being a female.

    Although I like Kuromi. She’s quite evil. >:]

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  17. @Ando: have you been to HOT TOPIC to see the Kuromi stuff they have out? There’s more of it out than there is HK stuff… I think it helps that she wears blavk since that is the store’s fav color.

    At this point I only buy stuff that is useful that I don’t already have… except my vice is HK Christmas Stuff… I have rolls of wrapping paper and all the collections but 2005… (and… if anyone have any they’d like to part with let me know).
    I have HK shirts, sweatshirts and lightweight jackets (all of which I need-otherwise I’d get arrested for going around naked!), HK blankets (which I need to stay warm), HK Hat, gloves and scarf…now only if I could find an adult HK snowsuit for myself 😉

    I go through phases… in the spring and early summer I don’t really buy a whole lot, but when the school shopping starts is when you find all the cute HK stuff… and then before and right after Christmas is when you get all the really neat stuff… yes I cannot wait to get my hands on the HK collection this year… oh wait did I mention this already????

    I’m getting my friend’s daughters (3 and 1 1/2) a HK tent & sleeping bag set from target for Christmas…gotta get them started early! Which I have achieved since their first gifts from me were HK plushies and matching blankies made by Me.

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  18. Be careful MHK06, if Acton gets wind of you making HK plushies your done for… lol You’ll find yourself in a pit putting lotion on or something like that……..;)

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  19. @Catherine
    No but if you keep badgering me like the guy you was trying to do a census on me I will have your liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti, chi chi chi chi. 😉

    Personally I lurk on eBay and if that doesn’t work I need to buy another plushie for my “niece” at sanrio. I have my eye on a 3ft one to add to my collect.
    ps I only have 22 plushies including five hello kitties. I got room for more. It a furry thing.
    No plushies were harmed in writhing this post. 😉

    Reply
  20. Indiana, Ando
    Can’t you shop Hot Topic on line? By the way Indiana, I love Australia been there several times. Usually Tasmania.

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  21. Yeah, I can do it online, but sometimes it’s best to look at the clothes at Hot Topic for real—-because even though they look great online, they may be crap in real life.

    It’s been my experience anyway.

    Reply
  22. This almost sounds like a Kitty addicts intervention. Mr Hkh undoubtedly lives in this hell and everyone is opening up to their original addiction/attraction to this kitty. I am in my 30’s as well and love it to where I did go to the Sanrio 30th anniversary to have Hello Kitty cake with a person dressed in the Kitty suit. Alot of kids were there, their mothers, and young women who were fanatics. Hottopic.com is the site to go if you can’t visit a store, where they have exclusive things online as well. I enjoyed Hk as a child in the 70’s with a plastic figure but wasn’t that into it as a adult when I loved say Star Wars and Pokemon. I was watching the Real World in 94 when I saw this punkette, Frankie, and all her cute punk hello kitty stuff which set me on edge. I had to get it and then I collected it with a slight mania since. However, there is so much space, and one does have to limit one’s habits, I have a Hk toaster and don’t see the point in buying every toaster that comes out. The punk Hello Kitty bed cover is available in Hot Topic online but also on ebay, Target, and Kohls. My late father would gripe at the stuff I had in the living room, and recently my own mother bought me a lunchbox from Nordstrom which I didn’t ask for but do appreciate. I also have a few Kimora Lee Simmons pieces and Qvc has a Hello Kitty line out as well. Be practical with your budget and space to enjoy the Hk stuff. I think it becomes hellish when you have redundancy. I have the ” cat scractch fever” for several years, and it becomes tempered in time!

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  23. @Catherine..Yeah, it’s pretty unique to see everyone opening up to their origins on this eccletic madness. Reminds me of when the Cheschire Cat says” We are all mad here”.. and the new Hello Kitty Alice line is adorable!

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  24. @Catherine,

    Sadly, no. I don’t think I can use Australian Money to buy on HT online. And you’ve been to Tassie? Lucky. I want to go to Tassie. I live in Melbourne. ;__;

    (Also, you should go to the Gold Coast in Queensland next time you go to Australia. Sea World, Movie World, Dream World, Wet n’ Wild Water world…..So many theme parks. =D)

    Reply
  25. Indiana, if you have a bank account with a Maestro or Visa Electron ATM card , you should be able to buy stuff on-line with that, or you might ask your parents if they would let you buy stuff on their Mastercard or Visa: That will definitely let you buy in foreign currency, but currency conversion fees, shipping (and possibly Australian import taxes; you’ll need to research those for yourself) could be a killer. I know they can more or less double the sticker price of some stuff from the USA for me.

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  26. I only buy from “known sites” too, and have never registered for internet banking. It’s not that I don’t trust the banks with my money, but that I don’t necessarily trust their security to match people like Amazon.

    Reply
  27. MHK, I’m going to guess you don’t know anyone who’s had “issues” with Paypal then? I refuse to have anything to do with them, because I reckon the number of people I know who’ve followed their rules, been ripped off by the other party, and lost the goods and money is now into 3 figures!

    Reply
  28. No, the issues I’ve had have been with ebay itself… no problems with Paypal though… the one time I had issues I got my money refunded… and the two partial refund i’ve given went just fine.

    BTW- Happy Birthday to me, happy birthday to me! (29)

    Reply
  29. So I counted all my HK clothing items last night as I was cleaning..because I was wondering how much I actually had… now I’m a little scared.

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  30. ““Is she like, English as a first language Asian, or Hello Kitty Asian?””

    My car is kinda decked out in HK, but only the seat covers and the belt covers. Everything else (steering wheel cover etc) is also pink.

    At the same time, however, I’m also pretty much an English as a first language Asian….

    So which description do I get?

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  31. I happened to stumble across the HK car.. God forbid your wife sees this.. ( I’m sure she has though).. I am sure that you don’t want to see the car.

    I can’t imagine having everything in my life themed.. Kudos to you. You must really love your wife.. My husband wouldn’t tolerate it! lol

    Your site is great. You guys have a great sense of humor!
    Cheers,
    Blondie

    Reply

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