Hello Kitty Golf Putter

One of the worst aspects of living with a Hello Kitty fanatic is that you never know what Hello Kitty items are going to end up in your stuff. This is bad enough when you catch the fact before it has a chance to unexpectedly surprise you, but there are times when the addition goes undetected until the moment when it completely humiliates you. That is exactly what happened yesterday when I went golfing with a few friends.

It’s already bad enough that I have to play with Hello Kitty golf balls. The jokes are pretty much non stop every time I pull out a ball to tee off and no matter how tough you look, playing golf with Hello Kitty golf balls is going lower your manliness in the eyes of everyone that sees you by a few thousand percent.

So I made the Hello Kitty Hell mistake of believing it couldn’t get any worse. You know those dreams you have where you are in some crowded public place in your underwear or with no clothes on and you are completely mortified? That only begins to describe how I felt when we approached the green on the first hole and I went to pull out my putter to find it had been replaced with this:

Hello Kitty golf putter

Hello Kitty golf putter

Hello Kitty golf putter

Hello Kitty golf putter

Hello Kitty golf putter

Apparently my wife decided that she needed a Hello Kitty putter (no, of course she doesn’t play golf) for the one time every 5 years we play miniature golf and decided the best place to keep it would be in my golf bag (don’t ask, but it apparently makes perfect sense to a Hello Kitty fanatic). Since there was no reason to have two putters in a golf bag, she took out my putter and placed it with my older clubs in the garage (again, no normal person would ever think of doing this, but apparently this is the most logical course of action to take if you are a Hello Kitty fanatic). Thus the only thing I had to putt with was a Hello Kitty putter.

From the way my friends reacted, there doesn’t seem to be anything funnier than watching a grown man walk onto a green and put with a Hello Kitty putter, but they have informed me that I am the “cutest” male golfer they have ever seen. Great — exactly how I want to be perceived in life. The scariest thing? It was just another typical day in Hello Kitty Hell…

19 thoughts on “Hello Kitty Golf Putter

  1. Haahaahaaa, I was going to send that to you but decided against it. You should be glad that your wife did not get you the Hello kitty golf club holders. I do not mean the golf bags, they make that too. But now there are complete set of golf accessories available in Hello Kitty. Haahaahaaa…

  2. On the other hand, you get the satisfaction of hitting a Hello Kitty ball very hard with Hello Kitty’s decapitated head. Look on the bright side,

  3. Oh brother. Seriously dude, do you not have even the smallest control in your own life? I can understand living in hell (as I find it absolutely hilarious) but sometimes you need to stand up for your rights…and surely playing a sport she never does counts as one area where you might have just the tiniest of control…BUCK UP!

  4. That’s possibly the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever heard.

    You know, I would have thought that they would have drawn the line at creating the Hello Kitty vibrator… As a woman, I’m a big supporter of vibrators and all, but it frightens me that Sanrio doesn’t seem to have boundaries. What’s the most unwholesome thing they can make next? Maybe a conveniently packaged Hello Kitty Starter Dominatrix kit including the ever popular gag-ball?

  5. I like your HK golf balls better than the ones I just bought. 🙁
    That putter is too cute though. Obviously you & your wife love each other very much. Good for you!

  6. I’m very surprised she lets you use those golf balls. I’ve priced those on ebay and they’re a fortune! And last time I went golfing I lost like…. 8 balls…. and that um, adds up to a lot of money.

  7. where does the money to buy all this hello kitty stuff comes from? don’t consider dressing him as hello kitty. that’s just too far.

  8. my girlfriend is crazy about Hello Kitty and I´d like to buy her one of these putters, but I can´t find an online shop that ships outside of Japan 🙁
    Does anyone has an idea where to get one of these to Germany?

  9. Mr. HKH maybe you should sell the gifts your wife gives you. Tell her your spreading the love of HK to “those who deserve it more than I do”
    Just make sure whoever buys it will use it “appropriately” ahem,ahem.

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