Hello Kitty toothpick

The thing about living in Hello Kitty Hell is that you can never make a simple request and not have the evil feline right there to haunt you. You would assume that if you asked your significant other if they could hand you a toothpick, you would get a normal wood toothpick. Not in Hello Kitty Hell. I asked my wife if she could hand me a toothpick after dinner last night and she actually handed me Hello Kitty toothpicks:

Hello Kitty angel toothpick

Not satisfied to be plain Hello Kitty toothpicks, these are actually Hello Kitty angel toothpicks (why that actually makes a difference, I have no freaking idea, but apparently is does to Hello Kitty fanatics because my wife stressed that these were the Hello Kitty angel toothpicks).

If this in itself weren’t bad enough, Hello Kitty seems to believe that a toothpick looks like a pipe cleaner:

Hello Kitty toothpick

I took one look at those and decided that it would be vastly less embarrassing walking around with spinach stuck between my teeth than to have to use a Hello Kitty toothpick. I love dentists on par with the amount I love Hello Kitty, so when Hello Kitty makes a simple toothpick into an object that a dentist would gladly use on you, it’s pretty much a sign that it shouldn’t go into your mouth. Plus the fact that it has already been well established that Hello Kitty and teeth don’t belong together.

Now, I can think of plenty of alternative uses for these (I really think they would make wonderful eye cleaners for Hello Kitty plush), but most of them would relegate me to the Hello Kitty sleeping bag for the rest of the month. So, if you have a great need for these, please leave a comment on how you’d use them with the more detail, the better (if you are willing to take photos and / or video while putting them to use, that is definitely a bonus). I will send them out to the one who obviously needs them far more than I do…

34 thoughts on “Hello Kitty toothpick

  1. Next darlene will fall back upon her boiler plate of Mr. HKH not appreciating the HK brand dementia of his wife, how hard it must to be her, and what a liar/jerk/porn star he must be.

    darlene: Your lfe, such as it can be referred to as one, is shallow and empty. Do the world a favor and eat a salad made of tainted spinach, tomatoes, and bacon with a rusty HK fork.

  2. xD people who have braces would know what this is lol it’s called a proxybrush – I guess you could loosely call it a toothpick

  3. I need them. I would use them for there intended purpose of keeping my teeth clean and by using them I would have even a bigger smile knowing that Hello Kitty helped me make my teeth and smile beautiful. By giving them to me, I would show how Hello Kitty can help us all in little ways to make ourselves better and keep us healthy.

    I hoped you asked your wife that it is okay to give this away. If she said yes, you should give it to someone that will appreciate it the most and that would be me.

  4. OH MY GOD
    dude, darlene has been bashing you for like possibly years and the second you offer something, even something this dumb, not a bad word out of her. just self righteous arogance haha
    hmmm now how would i use them. no ideas yet but i’m sure to come back with something

  5. i think darlene is my lost evil twin sister from japan. but than again, it could be worst. i might be her lost daughter. hahaha

    and about the hello kitty toothpick. i need it for my toliet!!!!!!!!!

    my boyfriend dirty my hello kitty toliet seat!!!!

  6. These are so charming! The smallest could be used for cleaning one’s ears perhaps? All the better one needs to pick out the wax from your hello kitty earplugs which one wears to sleep from all the blares of the hello kitty theme on your radio. The second I would use to clean the hello kitty mouse or the hello kitty keyboard to pick up from the hello kitty pc. The third, hmm, to be used as to pull out the spindles for hello kitty therapy to pluck them all out for frustation in for living in hello kitty hell.

  7. Toothpicks? I don’t think so. XD

    I used those type of brushes when I had braces and needed to get food stuck between my braces and teeth out. (I don’t even know how you would use those as normal toothpicks! XD)

    It doesn’t look like they even come with replaceable heads. Three uses and your done! (Wow…useless!) My mother would have wanted them for me all the same though…

  8. Ok like amber said the last time I used such a thing (in non-HK brand) was when I had braces, I really don’t think those are even dsigned to go between the teeth. And even with braces they don’t work too well. I wouldn’t pay any amount for them, HK or not.

  9. I think it would tickle my mouth if I’d use them for their intended purpose. But if I had a hold of them, I’d use them to carefully clean each nook and cranny of my loving husband’s Xbox 360, since that’s the least I can do, given he has gifted me many greatly loved HK items for my kitchen as well as jewelry. I’d make sure it was cleared of dust so that it would be at peak performace when he played his beloved Halo games. Giving them to me would be way better than giving them to Darlene b/c at least I would be using them to benefit someone else other than myself.

  10. After my husband read this last comment, he requested that I don’t “contaminate” his Xbox 360, lol…

    Instead, I’d use these HK toothpicks to carefully detail the nooks and crannys of my mother’s bedroom set, making sure it was cleaned to perfection. And yes, I believe she deserves it too b/c she spend many years investing in my happiness by purchasing all kinds of HK items for me throughout my youth, in particular, new HK school supplies each and every year of my education. I truely believe this helped me feel extra special and to be excited about school, which in turn, helped me to be a better student and be the first one in my family to go to college. So please give them to me b/c they would really be put to good use! Not only would I appreciate them more than crazy Darlene, but my mom would appreciate them too!

  11. @Katsuko: oh gosh i remmber those things. yech had braces on and off for a few years. never liked them. never liked the proxybrush either. i’d personally snap them in half.

  12. OKAY… so am I the ONLY one who noticed that darlene was actually kind of *nice* in this post????
    Maybe she finally started on that Prozac people have been saying she needs 🙂

    So these are actually something that is, ahem, ‘useful’…
    though why a plain white non-descript set wouldn’t do the trick, I’ll never know…
    Dude, I would so use these to clean the toilet, detail the stove… your car… anything really…

  13. @Sanriobaby: You hubby is funny… ‘don’t “contaminate” his Xbox 360’…ha ha ha ha!!!!!
    Men, ya gotta love ’em…
    …or not…

  14. Okay (sorry all) once more…
    Mr. HKH… I will use them to clean my 2 cats and 1 dog’s mouths… that’s pretty nasty right????

  15. Did you notice that Darlene said “NEED” and not want? Just goes to show how obsessed she is.

    Yet another waste of money, resources and atmospher to make these. Just plain worthless.

  16. those are for braces

    my sister uses little brushes like that to clean in between them

    i dont think you have big enough gaps to fit that between every tooth

  17. Mhkitty, I belive Darlene’s only being “nice” because she actually thinks there’s a chance in HK Hell that she might actually get these…whatever the hell they are.

    HKH, forget giving the things away! Post a video of you torching the crap! That would be awesome! (And right after that, you could torch that damned sleeping bag!)

  18. yeah, i vote giving them to a dog to let him “learn to clean his own teeth” and then possibly a lawn mower and then a box of fire crackers, cause, you know, those get dirty too

  19. Sanrio’s not totally warped. That’s not their version of a toothpick I swear! I actually keep their real versions of toothpicks in my purse. Pic: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v669/GremlinGirl/IMG_0488.jpg
    My friends are always in the same situation, as in, when they ask for toothpicks at restaurants, I always come to the rescue with my Hello Kitty ones. You should be proud, I ripped one open just to show you… I’m wasting Hello Kitty, OH NOES!

  20. Suzanne, or may I call you GG?, there’s something wrong there! That toothpick:-
    1) Looks actually well-designed and useful!!
    2) Isn’t Pepto-Bismol coloured!!!

  21. The package is actually pink, it just got washed out when I took the picture… but ya, the toothpick itself is just white… so my friends just toss the wrapper right away and are left with a normal toothpick… soo… not too bad.

  22. Ooh! i know what i could do with such a useless thing.. i could use those to pick my nose with. stick them in your nostrils and– walla! something that is actually useful.

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