One mans hell with cute overload
The evil feline seems determined to place herself in the center of drug culture because, let’s face it, there is absolutely no place the evil feline isn’t willing to go to make a buck. With Hello Kitty cocaine (and cocaine straw), Hello Kitty bong (and hk x LV bong), and Hello Kitty ecstasy you knew that there would be Hello Kitty pipes out there:
As if science isn’t having enough trouble in schools, fanatics somehow thought this would be a good idea — the Hello Kitty periodic table:
I debated whether or not I should post this, but I decided that if the fanatics here find something to focus on rather than this blog, that can never be a bad thing. Apparently, someone thought that it would be a good idea to make a documentary film about Hello Kitty fanatics (obviously someone that has never really had to spend much time with them in the past). I assume it’s going to be marketed as some type of real life horror film. Either that or it was special requested by the Department of Homeland Security to be used as the ultimate weapon to obtain confessions from suspected terrorists. Either way, it’s not going to be pretty and there will obviously be an unsuspecting film crew that will end up being scarred far deeper than they ever imagined for the rest of their lives.
I knew that things weren’t going to be good as soon as Hello Kitty duct tape came to existence. This was quickly confirmed with the Hello Kitty duct tape purse and then there was absolutely no doubt with the Hello Kitty duct tape dress. Of course, fanatics of the evil feline couldn’t leave bad enough alone and decided that a Hello Kitty duct tape bra was in order:
While Hello Kitty fanatics don’t realize it, when they hang a Hello Kitty holiday wreath on their door, they are conveniently warning everyone in the neighborhood the terrible dangers that lurk inside. Believe me, you disregard this warning sign at your own peril:
As if there was really a need to have one more reason to want this season to end as quickly as possible (see Hello Kitty Christmas trees and Hello Kitty ornaments if you had any doubts), this should quickly put the question to rest: a Hello Kitty Christmas music video that is guaranteed to haunt you long after the new year begins (you have been warned)
Yet another poor soul that ended up in the tattoo shop after too much Hello Kitty beer and thought this would be a good idea…
Seriously, the people at Sanrio have gotten to the point that not only are they not even trying anymore, they are actively testing to see if there is anything that Hello Kitty fanatics won’t buy. Can you really come to any other conclusion when they are willing to release a product called “Who Pooped on My Toothbrush?” toothpaste in strawberry flavor?
You know that you really can’t take a fashion magazine seriously when they are willing to place the evil feline on the cover. You know they have gone completely insane when they think that doing a double cover is something that’s acceptable. We know that Elle Taiwan editors have guzzled the Kool Aid with their December Elle Hello Kitty magazine double cover:
When everything good in the world meets everything wrong with the world and wrong wins, the unfortunate and all too terrifying result is Hello Kitty bacon…
