One mans hell with cute overload
What should you get a soldier on his birthday? Apparently some people think that a Hello Kitty birthday cake with the evil feline in full combat uniform holding a machine gun is the way to go. Of course, this would include the words that Hello Kitty would undoubtedly be barking out to soldiers in the field if she were in command: “Guts & Drive!”
Sent in by HK Guy (via Artisan Cakes by e.t. – photo used with permission)
Have you ever wondered why Hello Kitty doesn’t have a mouth? Let me tell you, it has nothing to do with her “only needing to speak from her heart.” It’s because when she has a mouth, you see her as the true mutant that she actually is. See for yourself:
Sent in by Essi who found them at a flea market at Finland.
What is worse than Lady Gaga dressed in a Hello Kitty plush dress? The thought of a line of Lady Gaga Barbies wearing that Hello Kitty plush dress:
When you combine the holiday season with a Hello Kitty fanatic, nobody escapes. Not even the family dog, although the dog does appear ready to go for the jugular at the first opportunity:
Sent in by Kendra
When the evil feline puts her claws into you, it’s not pretty and you do things that you will undoubtedly thoroughly regret later in your life. I would be definitely be hiding behind a camera too if I was wearing this ridiculous monstrosity on my head.
Sent in by Kate
One more reason it is Hello Kitty Hellish having a Hello Kitty fanatic in the family during the holiday season (and a good way to make sure Santa never wants to return to your home again):
Left by on Kristine Facebook
It seems that the Hello Kitty beehive bees succumbed to the humiliation of having to be known as the Hello Kitty bees. At the time, Bill Bird was confused about why his bees were swarming even though the evidence was obvious as I explained:
The answer is simple. You’re making the bees live in a freaking pink Hello Kitty bee hive and they figured it out. It would make anybody angry and want to swarm. Of course, as anyone that would think it was a good idea to build a Hello Kitty bee hive in the first place, they try to rationalize the new found aggressiveness of the bees to something else.
I have no doubt that this was created to make sure that the significant other of every Hello Kitty fanatic suffers intolerable agony on a daily basis for the entire month of December as he has to listen each morning to the excited, high pitch squeals of joy about how cute that day’s chocolate blob of feline evilness is. Just saying from my own experience…
Sent in by Kiki
Update You knew that there could never just be one and that I would continue getting Hello Kitty Christmas crap after Christmas was long over…
Sent in by hellokitty_luver
Sent in by Hayley
This is on my wife’s current wish list which probably means that I will soon have the evil feline flipping me off every time I go to get a cup of life sustaining liquid. I wonder how long I will have to sleep in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag when my wife sees me returning the favor while yelling at the water dispenser, “%*@& you too! How the hell can you get away sitting around flipping off the world and claim you are simply ‘sucking on your finger’ when you don’t even have a mouth!” I can see that I’m going to be needing a Hello Kitty straight jacket soon…
Sent in by Azielle
Don’t you have some holiday shopping to do? Yeah, it sucks fighting the crowds, but it is immeasurably more pleasant than looking at the links below that didn’t make the front page this past week. So is eating fruit cake — or for that matter, getting whacked upside the head with a fruit cake. What I’m trying to subtly say is that you can basically do anything else that you can imagine — no matter how painful it may be — and you will be much happier than looking at the links below. You’ll also save yourself the inevitable nightmares for the rest of the week. You know, one day I’m hoping that you finally learn…
Hello Kitty Gangster Car (update)
Hello Kitty Hand Grenade (update)
Hello Kitty Throws Up Rainbows
Hello Kitty Snuggie
Hello Kitty Nipple Tassels (update)
Hello Kitty Edible Fruit Bouquet (update)
Hello Kitty Xmas Tree (update)
Hello Kitty Pink Room (update)
Hello Kitty Band Aids (update)
Hello Kitty Pajama Bottoms on Men