Hello Kitty fanatics scare me. They scare me for a couple of reasons beyond the obvious that they are way too fanatical about Hello Kitty. First, they try to outdo one another. That is, they each believe that they are the most fanatical Hello Kitty fan and thus will do crazy things to prove that point. In much the same way that no matter how bad your think that Sanrio can get with Hello Kitty products, Hello Kitty fanatics always manage to find a way to do something insane to top one another.
Secondly, if they see another Hello Kitty fanatic has done something that they believe may make it look like that person is in the slightest bit more of a Hello Kitty fanatic than they are, they have to match and beat it. For the significant other, this ensures that Hello Kitty Hell continues to be a downward spiral into depths unknown. We live daily with the fear that some Hello Kitty fanatic is going to do something that will literally trigger all Hello Kitty Hell to break loose.
Today was one of those days when this arrived in my email:
Yes, you read that correctly. This person has officially changed her middle name to “Hello Kitty” and as soon as my wife saw that, you could see the gears start cranking inside her head: “Wouldn’t that be a great thing to do?!? Think about it. If I change my name officially to Hello Kitty, then you can call me that everyday.”
Yes, and as that thought entered and solidified in my mind, I made a quick dash for the bathroom to relieve everything that I had eaten for dinner. Living in a house full of stuff covered with the evil feline is one thing, having to address your wife by the same namesake is taking things to a completely different dimension.
My only saving grace is that making such a change in Japan is nearly impossible, but I truly fear that my wife will figure out a way to do it. If that day ever comes, Hello Kitty Hell will certainly have moved to an entirely new level…
Sent in by Jo (whose significant other is free to write guest posts for this blog at any time) who deserves punishment well beyond anything that can be humanly conceived for even the thought of giving an idea like this to my wife…