Flask

There is a never ending conflict that the evil feline must address on what is more important to her — living up to the expectation that she has as a role model of love and friendship for the young, or making money. Obviously the “love and friendship” side won out with the Hello Kitty flask, because we all know how important it is to impress upon children the need to consume vast amounts of alcohol:

hello kitty flask

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Ice Cubes

Anyone who lives with a Hello Kitty fanatic will know that there are many progressions which take you deep into the hellish nightmare that your life eventually encompasses. For many, the first sign that things aren’t right is when your morning toast inevitably shows up with the evil feline’s face on it. It’s simply one of those moments when it instantly dawns on you that things are much worse than you had ever imagined, and the uneasy feeling penetrates your entire body that it’s only going to get worse. Another one of those terrible realizations occurs when these first show up in one of your drinks:

hello kitty ice cubes

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Pink Goose Vodka

It has already been well established that the evil feline is more than willing to pimp out anything that she feels will earn her a buck and that Hello Kitty loves her booze, so I guess I really shouldn’t be surprised by this. It seems that a single type of Hello Kitty vodka is not enough — and apparently not kid friendly enough as well. Thus the introduction of Hello Kitty Pink Goose vodka:

Hello Kitty Pink Goose vodka from Japan

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Hello Kitty Belly Washers

In her never ending quest to turn the stomach of all sane people while promising rainbows out the back end for her devote followers, Hello Kitty believes that her diabetes inducing soda (Hello Kitty Belly Washers) will somehow wash away all the bad of those who drink it. Far more likely is that it ends up coming right back up the end it originally went down since that is the most common reflex the evil feline warrants in most of us:

hello kitty belly washers drink

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Hello Kitty Luxury Water

One would assume that Hello Kitty had covered all the water options ( the Hello Kitty water dispenserHello Kitty regular bottled waterHello Kitty premium bottled waterHello Kitty body shaped mineral waterHello Kitty skin water), but that would be greatly underestimating her ability to find new markets. Apparently, she felt that she was missing the luxury water market:

hello kitty jewelry water

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Hello Kitty Ice Cube Tray Giveaway

It is not often that my wife will give away things in her Hello Kitty collection, but she always has a soft heart when it comes to good causes. When we were in Japan, we used to give toys to a local orphanage. Now that we are back in the US, we needed to come up with a new project. We have set a very ambitious goal to provide a lot of food to food banks, and although we have just started, we are making a difference.

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Hello Kitty Water Dispenser

This is on my wife’s current wish list which probably means that I will soon have the evil feline flipping me off every time I go to get a cup of life sustaining liquid. I wonder how long I will have to sleep in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag when my wife sees me returning the favor while yelling at the water dispenser, “%*@& you too! How the hell can you get away sitting around flipping off the world and claim you are simply ‘sucking on your finger’ when you don’t even have a mouth!” I can see that I’m going to be needing a Hello Kitty straight jacket soon…

Hello Kitty water dispenser

Sent in by Azielle

Hello Kitty Bottle Bottled Water

It started off with Hello Kitty bottled water and most people figured that would be enough to satisfy the Hello Kitty fanatics. Not Sanrio. In the unfortunate and misguided belief that the evil feline can be sexy, Sanrio introduced another line of water bottled in Hello Kitty body shaped bottles. Though we all looked to the forces of reason to stop things there (and without even getting into the absurdity of Hello Kitty skin water), stopping there would disregard the total lack of common sense with which we have grown accustomed to when it comes to the combination of Hello Kitty and uselessness. This time it has taken form as Hello Kitty bottle bottled water:

Hello Kitty bottle bottled water

Hello Kitty bottled water kitty

Sent in by stephy

Hello Kitty Worst of and Weekly Photo Dump

I received the following question in my email the other day:

What are the worst Hello Kitty products out there?

“Everything?” would be my immediate response. That being said, many of the things that I personally find horrifying never seemed to raise much of a ruckus among the readers here and the Hello Kitty fanatics — well, let’s not even go there. I guess my life has become so Hello Kittified that I have a hard time distinguishing between Hello Kitty bad, Hello Kitty worse and Hello Kitty worst. So here’s a challenge/question – what are the top three worst Hello Kitty items I have listed on this blog (yes, I know there are a number of items even worse that I have not listed, but I try to keep this blog semi family safe) and why do you think so?

I’m hoping that some of you will be able to put together a rational explanation that I can give to my wife to show her that some of this crap is downright crazy — all while not getting me sent to the couch in the Hello Kitty sleeping bag for the rest of the month. Yeah, I know. It isn’t going to work, but I have found that deluding myself that there is hope of one day escaping from Hello Kitty Hell makes the Hello Kitty toast and coffee go down easier in the morning…

Here’s this week’s Hello Kitty photo dump:

Hello Kitty DragonCon Pasties Nightmare
Hello Kitty Birthday Party
Hello Kitty Minivan
Hello Kitty 35th Anniversary Laptop
Hello Kitty Robot
Hello Kitty Bed
Hello Kitty Rain Boots
Hello Kitty Knife
Hello Kitty Pink Room
Hello Kitty Cutting Board
Hello Kitty Mascot Costumes

And a few photo post updates:

Hello Kitty Bra Shop
Hello Kitty Anime
Hello Kitty Bar
Hello Kitty sandwich