One of the worst things about Hello Kitty is the sheer abundance of terribly annoying crap that the evil feline produces. A perfect example of this is the Hello Kitty hole punch:
Month: May 2008
Hello Kitty Ice-Cream
It should be no surprise that Hello Kitty will Kittify anything sweet since there are already confectionery shops devoted to the evil feline. So I really should have been more prepared when the Hello Kitty ice-cream arrived at our house the other day:
Hello Kitty Shotaro Kaneda Tattoo Akira Manga Anime
In a continuing sign that all is not right in the world, people still believe for some unfathomable reason that it’s a good idea to combine Hello Kitty and other anime characters into tattoos — which only produces Hello Kitty Hellish results. There isn’t much more you can say about something like the Hello Kitty Shotaro Kaneda tattoo:
Hello Kitty Japanese Goodwill Tourism Ambassador
I should have known that Hello Kitty Hell would not let me off that easily. After receiving over 20 emails yesterday about this I thought I could avoid the entire thing by placing a small blurb at the end of a post saying that I was aware and that everyone that visits here can stop sending me emails about it. Of course, in a non Hello Kitty Hell world that would mean that people would stop sending me emails about this and the entire horrific episode could be quickly forgotten as I pretended it never happened — but since I do live in hello Kitty Hell, it instead opened the floodgates and I can now assume that every person that has ever seen this blog has informed me of this news – Hello Kitty has been given an official title and made “goodwill tourism ambassador” of Japan to China and Hong Kong:
Hello Kitty Face Sewing Machine
I know that things are getting bad in Hello Kitty Hell when the transformer Hello Kitty sewing machine doesn’t seem quite as bad as I first thought. What could get me thinking this way? The Hello Kitty face sewing machine, of course:
Hello Kitty Nun
If I ever came across this on the street, I think I would simply jump in front of a car and get the pain over once and for all. I don’t think there is a whole lot more to say about the the Hello Kitty nun costume:
Hello Kitty Water Fountain Statue
My wife now wants to fly to New York this summer. Take one guess why? It seems that Tom Sachs has put up some giant Hello Kitty and friend statues in New York for the summer including a 18,000 pounds, 21-foot-tall Hello Kitty and a Hello Kitty water fountain:
Hello Kitty Toothpaste
I know that it’s going to be a Hello Kitty Hellish week when my wife comes up to me with a huge smile on her face, her hands behind her back and asks me the dreaded question, “Guess what I have for you?” At that point I usually think that it would be a lot less painful to simply off myself at that very second, but somehow I manage to get a serene look on my face and ask back, “I have no idea, what is it dear?” (I think if they gave a reward for the person that could hide their true emotions, I would be in the running). Then, of course, I get presented with something like Hello Kitty toothpaste:
Hello Kitty Skeleton Butterfly Tattoo
What, exactly, is it with Hello Kitty fanatics, tattoos and combining things that never should be combined? (Plenty of examples for your torment). Let me introduce you to yet another one — the Hello Kitty Skuterrfly tattoo:
Hello Kitty Robomop
In Hello Kitty Hell one would imagine that it couldn’t get worse than having Hello Kitty on every shelf constantly staring back at you in your home, but then that would be once again underestimating the evil feline. Now I have to constantly watch where I walk so that I don’t trip over my wife’s latest addition to her ever growing collection: the Hello Kitty Robomop:
