One mans hell with cute overload
Hello Kitty on anything is a disaster in itself. Give that Hello Kitty item to a celebrity and that disaster only amplifies untold times. Kelly Clarkson x Hello Kitty is a perfect example. I’m not sure what I find more disturbing — the fact that a Hello Kitty garter belt exists or that Kelly Clarkson thinks that a Hello Kitty garter belt should be worn on her head:
I’m beginning to think that creative editing (much along the lines of Hello Kitty coloring pages) might be the way to help lessen the agony of living in Hello Kitty Hell. If a Hello Kitty fanatic decides to gift you a Hello Kitty growth chart, what is the best way to proceed after the stomach churning realization that you may have to stare at the nauseating image for the foreseeable future? How about turning it into a Hello Kitty skeleton growth chart?
You’re excited for Halloween because you have decided to go out as Darth Vader. You can’t wait for your friends to see your awesome costume. Then mom says that you have to take your little sister with you. You can’t believe your rotten luck. Having your little sister tagging along is going to ruin everything. You think that it is the worst thing that could ever happen to you. That is until you see your little sister’s costume:
One would think that with all the Hello Kitty cars that already exist in the world (Hello Kitty Ferrari, Hello Kitty Pick-Up Truck and Hello Kitty VW Bug to name just a few — and I know you really don’t want me to go on which, unfortunately, I could…), that the evil feline would finally decide that there would not be a need for any more. Of course, you would be wrong. Apparently Honda has jumped in bed with Hello Kitty to create the Hello Kitty Honda Fit:
Having a formidable weapons cache isn’t enough for the evil feline when all it includes is a Hello Kitty Armoured Personnel Carrier. There needs to be more. Thus, something as horrendous as the Hello Kitty tank exists:
There are two truths about Hello Kitty: She’ll piggy back on anything that she thinks will sell her brand and go anywhere to do it. It is because of this truth that it is no surprise (although still stomach churning) that the evil feline has found her way to Burning Man in the form of Buddha (never say that Hello Kitty discriminates against religions). I guess Burning Man is now off my lists of events to attend…
Sent in By Patrick
One would assume that after the Hello Kitty latex bed there would have been enough Hello Kitty kink for the week, but then that would be greatly underestimating how much Hello Kitty loves her sex. This was made readily apparent when I found out that the Hello Kitty S&M love hotel existing was not enough, and someone felt it essential to build another Hello Kitty bondage room:
The mere fact that I not only know what this is and what it is used for should make me want to end my life. Unforetunatley, the pain doesn’t end there. My wife has actually tried to put Hello Kitty eggshell membrane oil on my face (see, your life doesn’t seem all that bad at the moment, does it?) which is positive proof that I live in Hello Kitty Hell:
If you have spent any amount of time on this blog, you know that when it comes to Hello Kitty tattoos, the evil feline has no problem mixing it up with absolutely everything. This includes religion, so it really shouldn’t come as a surprise that someone thought that a Hello Kitty Virgin Mary tattoo would be a good idea:
It became obvious long ago that despite the the innocent persona that Hello Kitty tries to cultivate, she has a lot of sex on her mind. There is no other reason that the people at Sanrio revived the Hello Kitty vibrator or that they would allow a campaign like this. This is not to mention the Hello Kitty bondage hotel or the Hello Kitty S&M flogger (I could go on, but I think you get the point). So is it really much of a surprise that there is a Hello Kitty latex bed?
