Hello Kitty Week in Review

It’s that time of the week again to self inflict massive amounts of pain to your brain by looking at the Hello Kitty crap that didn’t make the front page. This email I received sums it up pretty well:

This site freaking proves how deadly and dangerous a place the internets really is. One minute I’m pretending to work while searching guitars on google and everything is great the world is a happy place for me. About 3 clicks and 2 minutes later I’m in “WTF” HelloKittyHell?!!? (The sad part is, I’ve been here like 2 hours looking at hello kitty vibrators and handguns!) — Kelly

Proceed at your own risk:

Hello Kitty Google Chrome Theme
Hello Kitty Sushi Plush (update)
Hello Kitty Snuggie (update)
Hello Kitty Darth Vader Helmet
Hello Kitty Kilt
Hello Kitty Tattoos (photo gallery)
Hello Kitty Scarification (photo gallery)

And just to make the week all the more Hellish, I now have readers whining for Hello Kitty crap from me (which I would obviously already be giving away if the consequences from my wife weren’t so severe)

I was the winner of the Hello Kitty optical mousepad (which I am enjoying, by the way), and I have a sad story. For Christmas, my boyfriend, whom I live with, promised to get me the Build-A-Bear Hello Kitty doll. Instead, he got me nothing. Not a flower. Not a card. Nothin’. Zip. Zilch. He said he “didn’t have time.” This has made me incredibly sad and has RUINED my holiday (especially since I knitted everyone in his WHOLE family personalized scarves, AND got him plenty of Christmas gifts). I feel an injustice has been done to me.

I am aware of you and your lovely wife’s recent return to the US. Welcome back. If you feel obliged to send any of your wife’s extraneous Hello Kitty dolls my way, no matter how small, you would make a Georgia girl’s holiday happy again! I know this request may sound pathetic, but I am feeling despondent and, quite frankly, heartbroken. I wanted a Hello Kitty gift this year, and was severely let down. — Rebecca

Believe me, if you have to rely on someone living in Hello Kitty Hell to rescue you from being despondent because you didn’t get the Hello Kitty crap you wanted for Christmas, you’re going to be despondent for a long, long time…

Hello Kitty Weekly Photo Dump

For those of you that enjoy torturing yourself to no end, here are the photos from the last week that didn’t make the front page of the blog, but still will send shivers down your spine (just don’t do it – you’ll be much happier if you avoid these links and go for a long walk – you have been warned…)

Hello Kitty Porn Star Tera Patrick (sfw)
Hello Kitty Farmville
Hello Kitty Tattoo Promo
Hello Kitty Sushi Plush
Hello Kitty Gangster Car
Hello Kitty Telephone Booth
Hello Kitty Nori Cutter
Hello Kitty Skis (update)

See, I told you…

Hello Kitty Sushi Plush

The fact that Hello Kitty sushi exists is a pretty good damnation of the human race. That the evil feline also encourages fanatics to wear Hello Kitty chopsticks in their hair when she monetises this trend just further proves that all is not right in the world these days.

Hello Kitty sushi roll plush

Sent in by Jessica

Update Mike Mozart reviews Hello Kitty plush for his failtoys Youtube channel: