One mans hell with cute overload
I want to first make it clear that I have nothing against breast cancer campaigns, but I do have to say that these campaigns have gotten way out of hand when someone thinks that it is a good idea to get a Hello Kitty tattoo with a breast cancer pink ribbon as the bow:
I have no idea what the purpose of silly bandz are, so I guess it makes perfect sense that the evil feline would want to align herself with them:
There are far too many Hello Kitty tattoos out there, but at least this one doesn’t hide exactly how the evil feline feels about you:
This is exactly how my wife thinks all women should dress (seriously) and why she looks forward to Halloween so much. It certainly doesn’t help that she is a huge Rie Miyazawa fan as well which means I have to watch this commercial over and over and over again.
One would hope that it would be possible to escape the evil feline every now and again, but Hello Kitty always does her best to make sure that isn’t possible. Even a trip to the local beach is wrought with the risk of coming across a 26 foot tall Hello Kitty balloon (with all her character friends as giant beach ball floating in the water) to guarantee that a perfectly good day at the beach will be ruined:
Apparently there is a rumor going around that Hello Kitty was created as a result of a pact with the devil. While I would like to claim that this idea was mine (hey, I live in Hello Kitty Hell), it turns out that this episode is far more sinister:
The story is how Hello Kitty came to be…that a mother or father, depending on the version of the story had a child that had cancer. The parent made a pact with the devil that if the child was cured they would create a character in the devil’s honor that would be adored worldwide. There are different variations but they all boil down to the point that Hello Kitty is evil and that God fearing people should stay away from any HK products as they are affiliated with the Devil and Devil worship.
While this is not technically true, it’s hard to dismiss completely since Sanrio likes to use the devil theme on many of their products:
Note: Sanrio legal counsel has contacted me because they realize that their fans are not bright enough to know what is an official Sanrio product and what is not. They didn’t feel that this would be a problem until the fans started contacting them directly, and they soon realized how painful it was to actually have to converse with a fanatic, and not even they had the patience to actually do this. As a result, they sent out a notice to me begging for me to take down my posts about guns that had the evil feline on them just so they didn’t have to ever correspond with the fanatics again. When I explained that they brought it on themselves, they pleaded that I spare them the torture that they inflict on me on a daily basis and asked me to post the following, Since I actually have a conscience, here is what they have to say:
Sanrio® has informed us that Sanrio is not involved in the manufacture or sale of Hello Kitty guns or weapons, and does not allow Hello Kitty® to be used to market guns or weapons. The items shown in this post are either digitally fabricated images or were custom-decorated without Sanrio’s permission. Sanrio alleges that creating false digitized images of Hello Kitty guns or weapons, or custom-decorating a real gun or weapon with Hello Kitty art, infringes Sanrio’s copyrights and trademarks, and may violate criminal laws.
And onto the original post…
What does the evil feline do when she has plastered herself on a Keltec pistol? You get the fanatics to make it appear that it is all about peace and love (while you continue to add to your stockpile of Hello Kitty weapons so that you can eventually take over the world)
Sent in by kwikrnu
Apparently (who could have imagined?) there is someone with even more hostility toward the evil feline than I have:
Sent in by Minnie V.
You either had to have done something amazingly horrible in a past life or pissed off your co-workers to no end to deserve to have something like this done to your office cubicle. Either way, it is a good sign that it’s time to find a new job. I think this might even qualify as torture under the Geneva convention.
Sent in by Jose who says, “So a couple of years ago, one of my co-workers brought his lunch that his fiancee had packed in a hello kitty bag because they ran out of regular ones. We (of course) proceeded to mock him mercilessly for a few weeks about it. When he finally got married and went on his honeymoon, this is what we did to his cubicle. It took 5 of us a few hours to do it, and probably even used some pictures from your site.”
H. P. Lovecraft is likely turning in his grave (and stunned that his creation could be made so much more horrific). It is already well known that there should be a law forbidding Hello Kitty tattoo combinations. The Hello Kitty Cthulhu tattoo simply furthers this fact…
Left by Jenna on facebook