Hello Kitty Men Project

So, my worst nightmares are coming true in far too many ways (more on that in the coming days). The fact that the people at Sanrio have come to the conclusion it’s time to release a dedicated Hello Kitty brand for men certainly isn’t making these nightmares any less frightening. Apparently, they believe there’s a body of men who still don’t have a “preconceived idea” of the evil feline that associates it with little girls. They also think an image with a male model with a huge cartoon bow across his face to advertise the new brand is somehow going to appeal to someone with even a bit of sanity (granted, they are working with a customer base who will buy absolutely anything, so they really aren’t used to have to actually think about what they are creating…)

hello Kitty brand for men

I have no doubt they are simply trying to push all those poor souls who have managed to survive the hell of a friend or family member being a Hello Kitty fanatic over the edge when that fanatic decides the men in her life need to wear Hello Kitty with her. It’s a win-win for Sanrio. The fanatic buys more crap while those fighting the resistance are eliminated as they realize even the most horrific death is a lot less painful than having to wear a clothes line from the cat with no mouth.

The only good news here is that the actual new brand for men won’t be available until next year so we don’t have to immediately suffer the consequences. The bad news is that we now have confirmation things will continue to get worse…

Hello Kitty Three Apples Fashion

A few more reasons that my sanity is happy that I was able to avoid the entire Three Apples art exhibit and 35th anniversary celebration in person — There was no doubt that the Hello Kitty fanatics would be out in droves with their corresponding hideous Hello Kitty fashion outfits:

Hello Kitty fashion

Hello Kitty fashion at three apples

Hello Kitty three apples fashion

Left on twitter by aminerat (via laweekly)

Hello Kitty Tuxedo

It is amazing that week after week, when I somehow imagine that the worst of Hello Kitty has already found its way into our house and that things can not get worse (I know, I should know by now that it can always get worse, but all I have is hope…), it gets worse…much, much worse. There isn’t much that sends shivers down my spine these days, but this pretty much brings to the forefront the worst of my Hello Kitty Hell nightmares – a Hello Kitty tuxedo:

Hello Kitty tuxedo

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Hello Kitty Fashion Show Video

There is not much in this world that I would consider a worse form of torture and torment than having to sit through something like this Hello Kitty fashion show:

While my wife would view attending something like this close to heaven, I think I would need to carry around the sack full of the Hello Kitty barf bags just to make it through the first few minutes. It’s painful enough having to watch it on a video, let alone imagining what it would be like attending live. Of course, my wife is already frantically searching to see if there are other Hello Kitty fashion shows planned for the future — which means that my life could soon dive much, much deeper into Hello Kitty Hell…

Sent in by kttops who really deserves an extra special horrifying punishment for 1) making me sit through that video 2) upon seeing it, convincing my wife that not seeing a Hello Kitty fashion show will mean her life has somehow lost all its meaning 3) Thinking for even a fraction of a second that it would be a good idea to send me something like this…

Hello Kitty Humiliation – Photo of Horror 3

It’s my nightmare come true. No other words needed…

Hello Kitty humiliation

Hello Kitty humiliation

Left in the comments by Suzanne who says “My boyfriend dressed up in Hello Kitty stuff, but its only because the messageboard he visits had a thread called humiliating photos of yourself you wouldn’t want people to see so we took some photos” (it’s seems that he succeeded quite well and probably more than he ever anticipated since his girlfriend is leaving them on blogs like mine – someone is going to have a hard time leaving the house for awhile). Of course, this fails to address the reason why all the Hello Kitty crap was available in the first place…