Hello Kitty Paris Hilton Three Apples

As if there weren’t already 100 reasons not to attend the Three Apples Hello Kitty 35th Anniversary gala torture chamber, the fact that Paris Hilton showed up pretty much ensured that the whole event would have been unbearably painful:

Hello Kitty Paris Hilton Three Apples

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Hello Kitty Lady Gaga Markus & Indrani Photos

My wife was already a fan of Lady Gaga due to her Hello Kitty hair bow and visit to Japan where she professed her love of the evil feline. This has only grown as Lady Gaga posed for a Markus & Indrani photo shoot for the Three Apples art collection (yet another reason to avoid this if at all possible, as if you really needed another reason).

Hello Kitty Lady Gaga plush dress

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Hello Kitty Hilary Duff Skateboard

In my ignorance (helped along by a few beers of the non Hello Kitty persuasion), I mentioned to my wife that I thought it would be fun to get a skateboard. If I had been a bit more sober, I would have known before the words came out of my mouth that Hello Kitty would have one. Even worse, my wife found one that she thinks I should get because not only is it a Hello Kitty skateboard, it is a Hello Kitty Hilary Duff endorsed skateboard. Yep, that pretty much guarantees a Hello Kitty hellish day…

Hello Kitty Hilary Duff skateboard

Hello Kitty Anna Paquin Beach Cruiser

It’s never a good day when a celebrity is caught showing off some type of Hello Kitty product and then that photo is sent to me. In the mind of the Hello Kitty fanatic, this somehow legitimizes Hello Kitty. This is my wife’s reasoning — if Anna Paquin is riding around on her Hello Kitty beach cruiser, that must mean that Hello Kitty beach cruisers are cool because even the celebrities want to ride around on them:

Hello Kitty Anna Paquin beach cruiser

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Hello Kitty Katy Perry MAC Corset

I was hoping that I would not have to post this and that it would eventually fade from memory, but readers insist on continually sending me photos of this hideous Hello Kitty corset worn by Katy Perry as part of the MAC make-up collection. Considering what MAC did with their Hello Kitty MAC video and Hello Kitty MAC men, it’s not really a surprise that this monstrosity was also part of their collection:

hello-kitty-katy-perry-1

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Hello Kitty Lady Gaga Hair Bow

When you live in Hello Kitty Hell, you soon learn that there are way too many people that actually want to be Hello Kitty, so I guess that it really shouldn’t be a surprise that people would do something like take their hair and make it into a Hello Kitty bow:

hello-kitty-lady-gaga

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Creepy Hello Kitty Lisa Loeb Video

I guess it could have gone without saying since anything that involves Hello Kitty is “creepy” to some extent, but it seems to take on horror film dimensions when a Hello Kitty plush comes to life in the back of a music video. I just sat there watching — waiting for Hello Kitty to produce Alien fangs and suck the life out of Lisa Loeb. Either that or have Hello Kitty begin whacking Lisa Loeb over the head with the guitar until she was slumped in a pool of blood on the kitchen floor. The more I live in Hello Kitty Hell, the more convinced I become that Hello Kitty could be a huge horror movie franchise. Doubt me? Watch the video:

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