Hello Kitty Computer Keyboard

I knew this was bound to happen because it is, for lack of a better term, so Hello Kitty Hellish. My wife has been adding Hello Kitty computer accessories left and right: the USB powered Hello Kitty keyboard cleaner, the Hello Kitty USB foot warmers, and the Hello Kitty USB lap warmer — so what is the missing element? To start Hello Kittifying the computer itself. She took a big step in that direction when this arrived in the mail…the Hello Kitty keyboard.

Hello Kitty computer keyboard

Of course, there is no illusion that the Hello Kitty computer pimping is going to stop here. She is already on the lookout for “the perfect Hello Kitty computer” as well as exploring more Hello Kitty computer accessories to add. Which all points to Hello Kitty Hell moving beyond the current reality and becoming a virtual nightmare in the future…

Update: More Hello Kitty keyboards that would drive most people off the computer for life.

Hello Kitty keyboard

Hello Kitty computer keyboard

Hello Kitty pc keyboard

Sent in by stacyl (pink keyboard via number657).

hello kitty computer keyboard

Sent in by Vienne via Twitter

Hello Kitty USB Lap Warmer

My wife is continuing to add to her Hello Kitty computer accessories to the point that she is going to need to get a massive USB hub (I’m sure that they make a Hello Kitty one somewhere and if they don’t, it’s likely already in the works) for all the Hello Kitty gadgets. She has been in love with the Hello Kitty foot warmers ever since she got them (I just never look under my desk and try not to think about the fact that a grown man has his feet in warm, fuzzy pink slippers – can’t be much less manly than that), so when she came across the Hello Kitty USB lap warmer, she had to have it:

Hello Kitty USB Lap Warmer

My wife is deliriously happy that now not only are her toes toasty warm, both her lap and hands are also warm. She tried to get me to warm my hands, but I have resisted thus far. I’m afraid there may be hidden cameras that will catch the image of me in pink USB warmed slippers and a big, pink Hello Kitty face lap warmer on my knees which will eventually find their way onto some social network site where I will be humiliated to no end…I have no doubt that something like that is what Hello Kitty Hell has in store for me…

Hello Kitty USB Computer Keyboard Cleaner

As my wife continues to find gadgets that she “must have” for her computer, even from Hello Kitty Hell I’m amazed at all the Hello Kitty crap that gets sold. Granted, computer keyboards need to be cleaned from time to time, but would anyone in their right mind (I think we have already established that Hello Kitty fanatics fall outside these parameters) really need a Hello Kitty USB computer keyboard cleaner with two different cleaning heads? But since my wife is one of those that falls outside saneness when it comes to Hello Kitty, this is what she wants next for her computer.

Hello Kitty usb computer keyboard cleaner

Hello Kitty usb computer cleaner

Hello Kitty CDs

One of the things that is most frustrating about Hello Kitty Hell is that many of the Hello Kitty items in our house aren’t really Hello Kitty Items at all. They are normal, every day items in Hello Kitty packaging. No matter how many times I try to explain this to my wife, it doesn’t make any sense to her. Hello Kitty on the package means that whatever is inside is also Hello Kitty related in some way (thusly the mind works of the Hello Kitty fanatics the around the world).

Take these for example:

Hello Kitty CDs

They are CDs wrapped in Hello Kitty packaging, but they are the only ones my wife will buy. It doesn’t matter that the CD looks like any other CD once the packaging comes off. Since practically every item that exists comes in Hello Kitty packaging, you can begin to see the Hello Kitty Hell I must deal with on a daily basis

Hello Kitty USB Feet Warmer

Ever since my wife saw the pimped out Hello Kitty computer mod, she has decided that she needs to make her laptop more Hello Kitty like. Fortunately, she is too afraid to try and pimp out her computer in the same way as the one featured previously. While that is a small consolation prize in Hello Kitty Hell, it is mitigated by the fact that to compensate for not completely decking out the computer, she is purchasing every Hello Kitty add-on computer gadget that she can find. The latest of these being the Hello Kitty usb feet warmer.

Hello Kitty USB Feet Warmer

Now this would be bad enough if I had to look at them daily on her feet, but she also decided I needed my own Hello Kitty usb feet warmer and presented it in a way that I couldn’t really argue. Because our house doesn’t have central heating (which is common in Japan) and because energy prices are so high, getting a feet warmer would save a lot in energy costs as it is the feet that really get cold in winter.

So my choice this winter is to place my feet into those sickly, fuzzy pink foot warmers or let them slowly turn into blocks of ice. Since I still do value the use of my legs, the fuzzy, pink foot warmers usually win out. As I look at my Hello Kitty feet at this moment as I type (this epitomizes Hello Kitty Hell), I realise that there is something very wrong in making a man wear pink slippers of any kind. Isn’t there a law against this, or something? Maybe losing my feet to frostbite isn’t such a bad option after all…

Hello Kitty Extreme Computer Mod

When I get emailed things like this, it sends shivers down my spine. True, I should be thankful that my wife’s computer is not this bad at the moment, but that doesn’t mean it won’t eventually get there and surpass it. When I get photos like these, I see my future Hello Kitty Hell. That future is not pretty:

Hello Kitty extreme computer mod

Hello Kitty computer mod

While the person that posted the Hello Kitty laptop computer mod had the sense to label it as “hobbies gone wrong,” I doubt that any Hello Kitty fanatic would view it that way. My wife’s only reaction would be, “Where can I get one of those?!” It’s depressing enough looking at Hello Kitty Hell in the present, but knowing where it is likely going is down right gut wrenching…

Thanks (I think) to Mackenzie via Pink Hello Kitty Laptop

Hello Kitty Laptop & Ipod

My wife got wind that a special Hello Kitty laptop and ipod package will soon be launched in Japan so she wants us to go back there asap. See the problem is that this special offering is being limited to just 100 units so she is convinced that she will be able to resell them for a big profit. My worry is that they will never leave and just be more Hello Kitty Hell product filling up the house. The price also isn’t much of a deal with the pair selling for 248,000 yen (approx. $2100). We will be heading back for the New Year holiday there so I’m praying that they go on sale before then…

Hello Kitty Laptop

Hello Kitty Ipod

Hello Kitty Xmas Hell

I assumed that I wouldn’t have to deal with Hello Kitty Xmas Hell until next month, but as you can already tell from this blog, Hello Kitty Hell usually is not accommodating when it comes delaying anything Hellish. I went out to lunch with a friend this afternoon and when I came back, I found this attached to my computer:

Hello Kitty mouse

Now, I make my living on the computer and having to use a Hello Kitty mouse and mouse pad would take Hello Kitty Hell to unimaginable levels.

wife: Surprise!

me: ummm, what is that?!?

wife: Your Xmas present.

me: It isn’t Xmas yet…

wife: I couldn’t wait. They are soooo cute!

me: (please, please, let this be a dream – pinching myself to know that it is reality) Maybe we should put it away until Xmas (hopefully pleading under breath)

wife: Oh no. This is a special gift.

me: I feel bad. I didn’t get you anything. I think it is better to put it away until I get you something (not realising the trap I’d just snapped all around me)

wife: But you did! I got a matching pair for me from you!

So I sit, with Hello Kitty mouse glowing pink at me with Hello Kitty mouse pad underneath mocking me in her cuteness wondering what on earth can happen to make Hello Kitty Hell any worse…