One mans hell with cute overload
If you live in Hello Kitty Hell, you quickly learn that it is never a good idea to mention Hello Kitty and a food product in the same sentence. If you do, the result is often quite unfortunate and you end up with things like Hello Kitty pretzels in front of you:
Having a Hello Kitty fanatic in your life is bad. Really bad. So bad that nobody except those suffering through their own Hello Kitty Hell can even understand. My sympathies go out to you, but is actually can be worse. Seriously, I don’t think that there can be something quite as terrifying and sadistic as a follower of the evil feline that also likes to cook. All you have to do is look at Hello Kitty sushi (or even worse, Hello Kitty spam sushi) and Hello Kitty bentos to realize the horrifying truth to this statement. Or Hello Kitty onigiri:
When you live in Hello Kitty Hell, it is always extremely frightening to actually get up and walk to the table for breakfast. This is because you could very well wake up to something like Hello Kitty waffles which pretty much guarantees massive amounts of traumatic stress the rest of the day:
There was one point that the only thing I hadn’t seen was Hello Kitty pizza and Hello Kitty beer (which, of course, I have since seen). One would assume that this would pretty much indicate that the world was coming to an end and there would be no need to go any further, but that would be greatly underestimating the evil feline and her desire to not only co-opt everything possible, but also every variation of everything. Thus someone inexplicably thought it would be a good idea to create Hello Kitty mini pizzas:
I have absolutely no idea why the Hello Kitty toaster is such a popular appliance with Hello Kitty fanatics (quit sending photos of it to me!). There really is nothing that’s more dreadful than having Hello Kitty staring back at you in the morning when you still aren’t awake, especially when it is accompanied by a squeal of “how cute it is” when it is placed before you.
I’ve been avoiding writing anything about it simply because having to stare at Hello Kitty toast each morning pretty much is the limit anyone can take in regards to thinking about it each day:
I hate it when Hello Kitty photos ends up in my email box, but they always take on a bit more severity when that photo is of Hello Kitty food. Case in point, the Hello Kitty sandwich:
When it comes to Hello Kitty food, one would logically conclude that it really couldn’t get much worse than Hello Kitty instant ramen, but of course this assumption would be coming from someone that doesn’t really know the evil feline. Not satisfied with only the freeze dry ramen noodle market, Hello Kitty has branched off in an attempt to corner the canned ramen noodle market as well:
