My wife has a Hello Kitty guitar:
Now, any normal person would assume that if a person buys a guitar, they know how to play or have an interest in learning how to play the guitar. This logic, however, escapes the Hello Kitty fanatic. Not only does my wife not know how to play the guitar, she has absolutely no interest in learning how to play. Despite this, she has to have a Hello Kitty guitar because it is “sooooo cute” (I think these two words really should be banished from the English language).
Even worse? I’m not even allowed to play it. The other day, I thought It would be cool to learn to play a little and decided to get the guitar out to try. Now I know that a man playing a Hello Kitty guitar doesn’t do a whole hell of a lot toward creating a manly image, but I figured I was at home and nobody was ever going to see this indiscretion on my part. So I have it out and am about ready to play when all Hello Kitty Hell breaks loose
Now if there is anything worse than a Hello Kitty fanatic, it’s a Hello Kitty fanatic that is angry (note to all men who have the true misfortune to be involved with a Hello Kitty fanatic – don’t, under any circumstances, touch her Hello Kitty stuff without her permission).
wife: “Don’t you even think about playing that guitar. What if you accidentally scratch it?!?”
me: “What’s the use of having a guitar if you aren’t even going to play it?” (thinking: oops, should have stopped that before it came out)
wife: “You don’t understand anything. You don’t have to play to hear the music that Hello Kitty brings to everyone. All you have to do is look at it and you can hear the music.”
me: “…” (thinking: ?????????)
Which pretty much sums up Hello Kitty Hell – lots of Hello Kitty goods that have a use, but can’t be used for their intended purpose because Hello Kitty is on them (don’t worry, if none of that made sense, it just means you’re not a Hello Kitty fanatic which is a good thing)
Of course, now there are other Hello Kitty Guitars that have been made and my wife is considering which (or all if she can find the money) to add to her collection:
Hello Kitty Fernandes Collectors’ Edition
Hello Kitty Fender Stratocaster Limited Edition
Hello Kitty Fender Stratocaster (pink)
Hello Kitty Fender Stratocaster (black)
Hello Kitty Fender Mini (pink)
Hello Kitty Fender Mini (black)
Too many readers to list sent me photos of these guitars – may you all have to listen to Hello Kitty theme songs played on the guitar each day for the rest of your lives…
