Hello Kitty Smashing Pumpkins

It seems that all of Hello Kitty’s love and kindness wasn’t quite able to save her from this ignoble fate. Now if only I was allowed to do that to our pumpkins each year, I could definitely celebrate the evil feline’s birthday in style each year. Nothing wrong with dreaming…

Hello Kitty smashing pumpkins

Sent in by swipper

Update: Almost as satisfying as a smashed Hello Kitty pumpkin is a Hello Kitty pumpkin that goes wrong during the carving…

Hello Kitty pumpkin failure

Sent in by Jaime

Hello Kitty Darth Vader Halloween Costume

I never thought I would say this (and the fact that I’m about to is further proof that things are incredibly wrong in the world), but the Hello Kitty Darth Vader is becoming downright common. First there was the photoshopped Hello Kitty Darth Vader that lead to anime convention circuit Hello Kitty Darth Vader which lead to the Hello Kitty Darth Vader combination that just should have never come into existence (with the Hello Kitty Darth Vader tattoo thrown in for good measure). So is it any surprise that the Hello Kitty Darth Vader is now seen as an acceptable Halloween costume?

Hello Kitty Darth Vader Halloween costume

Sent in by swhero

How To Make a Hello Kitty Mascot Head

They really don’t celebrate Halloween in Japan, but that doesn’t stop my wife from doing her best to bring the evil feline into the holiday anyway. The one thing that she absolutely hates is that she can’t dress up in a Hello Kitty costume like she sees so many people do in the US, but since this guide on how to create your own Hello Kitty mascot head landed in my mailbox, she’s been strongly hinting that we need to join some of the US Halloween party celebrations in costume. Yet one more thing to worry about in Hello Kitty Hell…

Hello Kitty mascot head

Sent in by tauney (via instructables)

Hello Kitty Halloween Costume VII

Oh, you don’t think it would stop at a single Halloween costume sent to me in December, would you?

Hello Kitty Halloween costume

Of course not, this is Hello Kitty Hell. Once again we see Hello Kitty fanatics that are dressing up like Hello Kitty’s twin sister Mimmy (you know that Hello Kitty Hell is reaching all time lows when I am lecturing Hello Kitty fanatics that they aren’t dressing properly as Hello Kitty — damn, someone shoot me and put me out of my misery right now…) whether on purpose or mistake. It really doesn’t matter because to anyone who sees it, it’s terrifying either way…

Sent in by alison who should have to suffer a lifetime of lectures on proper fashion from the evil feline herself for even thinking it was a good idea to send this photo to me.

Hello Kitty Halloween Costume VI

Yes, it’s December and I’m still getting Halloween costume photos sent to me:

Hello Kitty Halloween costume

I took one look at this and thought, “You know, this looks like a torture device that they would use on terrorists to suffocate them into submission” and the minute I did, it occurred to me that is exactly what Hello Kitty does…combine still getting Halloween costume photos in December with that and it pretty much sums up Hello Kitty Hell…

Sent in by Jenn who should have to wear that mask tied extra tightly at the neck for the rest of the year for thinking it was a good idea to send me this Halloween photo…

Hello Kitty Halloween Costume V

And the Halloween Hello Kitty costumes keep coming:

Hello Kitty Halloween costume

With this note in the email:

haha enjoy this for your rants and raves!!! her name is candi kaboom…and her hobbies include dressing up like hello kitty!!!

There are so many things disturbing about this photo that I’m not sure where even to begin and therefore I think I will simply let all of you comment away. Of course, I can’t leave the post without making one small comment myself – it seems perfectly appropriate that someone named “candi kaboom” would be a Hello Kitty fanatic and why Hello Kitty fanaticism scares the hell out of me…

Sent in by Jill who should have to walk around like this all year as her punishment for reminding me how disturbing Hello Kitty Hell can be at its worst…

Hello Kitty WoW Halloween

If you thought the Hello Kitty World of Warcraft user interface was as bad as it could get, Hello Kitty once again proves that it’s always possible to get worse. Thus we find that Hello Kitty is now providing holiday themed Hello Kitty Wow user interfaces:

Hello Kitty wow Halloween

This is what makes Hello Kitty so annoying. Not only does she Kittify everything in her path, once she has Kittified it so you think it can never get worse, she’s really only just begun — and that when the different themes start arriving. Is there really any doubt that we will be seeing a Hello Kitty World of Warcraft Christmas theme in the future? Makes you want to run to the bathroom just thinking about it, doesn’t it?

Sent in by grace via Joi’s Flickr Photos, who should have to play all her games with a Hello Kitty theme for the rest of her life for extending my Halloween horror another day and thinking it could be a good idea in any way for me to see this…

Hello Kitty Halloween Costume II

It was bound to happen. Thinking that I could finally leave the Hello Kitty nightmare of Halloween (costumes and pumpkins) behind and begin to concentrate on what travesties Hello Kitty Christmas has in store for me, Hello Kitty fanatics would have none of that. One felt it was necessary to send me another Hello Kitty homemade Halloween costume:

Hello Kitty Halloween costume

Here is a little advice to remember whenever you have a costume to wear.

1. If your main objective is to make men run away from you screaming in terror, this is the perfect costume for you to wear.

2. If your main objective is to humiliate your partner to no end, this is the costume to wear.

3. If your main objective is to get yourself labeled as a Hello Kitty fanatic, this is the costume to wear.

4. If you want to live a relatively normal life and not traumatize the people you love, this is not the costume to wear.

I would have thought that showing photos of people placing these Hello Kitty heads on cats and dogs would have been enough to send the hint that they also would not be very fashionable on humans, but alas, I once again have greatly underestimated the fashion sense of Hello Kitty fanatics…

Sent in by Rachel who should have to wear that thing around every day of the year for thinking it was a good idea to send the photo to me.

Hello Kitty Halloween Costume

Halloween is not celebrated in Japan, but now my wife wants to dress up in a costume because of this photo sent in:

Hello Kitty Halloween costume

While my instincts are to go into yet another rant, maybe it will suffice to say that this is by far the scariest costume that anyone could come up with for Halloween. I have no doubt that little children screamed in terror as she walked down the street (because that is undoubtedly what I would have been doing if I had encountered it live). Maybe Hello Kitty and Halloween fit together a lot more than I have been been giving credit in the past. Either way, I have the distinct feeling that Halloween at Hello Kitty Hell is going to be downright scary now…

Sent in by Penny who should have to wear that thing year round for even thinking that sending me the photo and putting the idea into my wife’s head that a Hello Kitty Halloween costume would be a good idea…

Pumpkin Carving

It really does not help my Hello Kitty Hell when people actually take suggestions of my wife such as learning how to carve a Hello Kitty o’ lantern:

Hello Kitty pumpkin

via Movies of Myself (with the hope that it does mold and collapse into a zombie Kitty and we get to see a photo of that)

Hello Kitty pumpkin cat

Sent in by Marla (It seems to me that Kitty isn’t happy being associated with Hello Kitty)

Hello Kitty pumpkin

Hello Kitty pumpkin back

Sent in by someone who asked not to have their name revealed (someone with at least a bit of common sense, although he did make a Hello Kitty pumpkin so we may not be able to give him too much credit) from last year.

All these readers (and anyone else that decides to join them) should have to keep the Hello Kitty pumpkins for the entire year and watch as they decompose into the true character of the evil feline…

Update: I guess it shouldn’t be a surprise that after writing this, more Hello Kitty fanatics would send me photos of their Hello Kitty ‘o lanterns as well:

Hello Kitty pumpkin

From Jennifer…

Hello Kitty pumpkin

From Sandra…

Hello Kitty carved pumpkin

From natalie…

Hello Kitty carved pumpkin

From natalie…

Hello Kitty pumpkin

From Nicole…