Courtney Stodden Nightmare Video

What do you get from a want-to-be TV reality star teen (Courtney Stodden) who marries a 51-year-old actor (Doug Hutchison)? You get a video like this which Courtney obviously thinks is “cute” (how can you not think that as she coughs up a hairball?) but should help purge your stomach of all if its contents with ease (warning: this video can’t be unseen)

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Hello Kitty Christmas Music Video

As if there was really a need to have one more reason to want this season to end as quickly as possible (see Hello Kitty Christmas trees and Hello Kitty ornaments if you had any doubts), this should quickly put the question to rest: a Hello Kitty Christmas music video that is guaranteed to haunt you long after the new year begins (you have been warned)

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Hello Kitty by Swarovski

There are some things in life that when I see, I give thanks that I was somehow spared from the Hello Kitty Hellishness. That is exactly how I feel about this recent Hello Kitty by Swarovski event in Japan (prepare for 5 minutes of sickening sweetness if you dare to watch this video — I highly recommend you use common sense and don’t as this will save your mind from losing several IQ points)

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Hello Kitty Nightmare Video

One of the most difficult aspects of living in Hello Kitty Hell is explaining the complete fanaticism of Hello Kitty fanatics to people who have never met one. They simply have no reference, and any sane person would find it unbelievable the lengths that fanatics will go to surround themselves with the evil feline. This video gives a taste of what every Hello Kitty fanatic would like their house to look like (my wife is certainly doing her utmost to equal, if not surpass, it).

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Hello Kitty Furry Tail Theater: Wizard of Paws / Pinocchio Penguin

You would think that life in the US would be less Hello Kitty Hellish than in Japan, but you’d be wrong. My wife has discovered that in the US she can watch the Hello Kitty Furry Tail Series over and over again. Don’t think it could be that bad? Try watching for 5 minutes without wishing that a large space object of any kind would fall out of the sky and put you out of your misery.

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Hello Kitty Latex Fashion Show

I knew that I would regret posting the Hello Kitty handbag fashion show video. As soon as the video was posted, other Hello Kitty fashion show videos started appearing in my email box (to my disgust, but to the delight of my wife). Among these was a Hello Kitty latex fashion show (possibly nsfw)…

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Hello Kitty Handbag Fashion Show

I have no doubt that having to sit through a Hello Kitty fashion show would constitute torture to any civilized nation and most people would consider the death penalty appropriate for anyone that actually put one on (miraculously, this is one experience I have yet to endure although my wife still has it on the top of her list of things to do). The fact that they now have fashion shows exclusively for Hello Kitty handbags pretty much shows that the world is in far worse dire straights than anyone imagined:

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Hello Kitty Detox Cute and the Beauty Junkies Song

You have to question the sanity of any band that would think it’s a good idea to create a song about Hello Kitty. The fact that the band actually thought it would be a good idea pretty much indicates how it is going to be (for those that are unable to understand hint, that was a warning that you really don’t want to listen to this song if you want to keep your sanity):

You were warned…

Sent in by gina

Hello Kitty 35 Anniversary Video Hell

To celebrate her 35th birthday, the people at Sanrio decided to put together the ultimate 2 and a half minute torture video which will surely be used on terrorist until the UN intercedes and declares it inhumane. Unfortunately, they didn’t intercede quickly enough to save me (or you if you are insane enough to watch it):

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Hello Kitty Nun Music Video

For those of you who remember the Hello Kitty nun (yeah, I know you really didn’t need to be reminded about that, especially if you had somehow managed to get that image out of your mind, but it gives you a tiny sample of what it’s like to live in Hello Kitty Hell) and imagined it would stop there, oh how you underestimate the evil feline. Now the Hello Kitty nun is featured in a music video:

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