One mans hell with cute overload
What happens if you are a male in a Hello Kitty dominated family? You get stuck having to use things covered with the evil feline through no fault of your own which can be especially traumatizing when you are only in the third grade. Even when the Hello Kitty fanatics try to edit it to alleviate some of the embarrassment, it still ends up being pretty pathetic — like this “Fellow Kitty” sandwich bag. I feel for the poor kid because things are only going to get worse…
Sent in by Joann
I’ve seen a number of Hello Kitty gumball machines through the years and my wife always insists on getting a gumball out of them as if a Hello Kitty gumball machine will somehow make the gumball taste any better. I, on the other hand, simply see Hello Kitty gumball machines as a way for the evil feline to get me to put something in my mouth that she just vomited up…
Sent in by flora
More Hello Kitty gumball machines:
Sent in by Mark
I don’t think that guys understand the appeal of canopies over beds in the first place, but that lack of understanding compounds immeasurably when the canopy features the evil feline on it. Let’s hope that my wife fails to find one of these because I can think of nothing more disheartening than waking up in the middle of the night covered in a Hello Kitty net from which there seems to be no escape — kind of like the Hello Kitty Hell I now live in…
Sent in by robin and xgirl
I guess when you play competitive games, you have to sometimes sacrifice your dignity in order to win. That can be the only explanation for the Hello Kitty paintball gun. There is no doubt that upon seeing it, any opponent will be instantaneously frozen with both fear and disgust leaving him/her to be a sitting duck just waiting to be picked off. The irony, of course, is that the loser will go home having lost happily, knowing that he doesn’t have to live life with a Hello Kitty paintball gun. The victor, on the other hand, will carry the shame of owning that monstrosity which pretty much ensures lifetime psychological damage for the rest of his life. Even when you think you win with the evil feline, you lose…
sent in by freewin (via Charkrem)
Hello Kitty Hell took a major step down into the depths this past week which I never anticipated. I received an email from my parents in the US saying that a packaged addressed to a “Mrs. Hello Kitty Hell” arrived at their house and they wanted to know if I had any idea what it was about (they had no idea that I even wrote this blog). I instantly knew that whatever was going on, it was not going to be good.
One of the greatest tragedies of living in Hello Kitty Hell is that even when Halloween is over, the torture from the holiday doesn’t end because all the fanatics feel it necessary to email me and my wife their Hello Kitty costumes. All I can say is that I’m just happy that none of them ended up at my front door…
Sent in by Sabree
Sent in by danny
Sent in by Carmen
Sent in by Jaime (“I really wanted to be Hello Kitty and I thought that by duct taping my mouth shut I’d make it more accurate since she doesn’t have a mouth. instead everyone thought I was Hostage Hello Kitty.”)
Sent in by Kay (via myspace bragathon)
Sent in by Samantha (“This is not me, I merely found this picture mixed in with all of the other ones being uploaded for the halloween season.”)
Sent in by Sarah (“Better believe I dragged my husband into it.”)
Sent in by Jenn (mom to Seaney)
Left by Chema Cx on facebook
It seems that all of Hello Kitty’s love and kindness wasn’t quite able to save her from this ignoble fate. Now if only I was allowed to do that to our pumpkins each year, I could definitely celebrate the evil feline’s birthday in style each year. Nothing wrong with dreaming…
Sent in by swipper
Update: Almost as satisfying as a smashed Hello Kitty pumpkin is a Hello Kitty pumpkin that goes wrong during the carving…
Sent in by Jaime
In the never ending display of Hello Kitty combo tattoos that make absolutely no sense and will undoubtedly seem just as smart to have gotten 25 years from now, we have yet another entry — the Hello Kitty Pinhead tattoo.
Sent in by far too many people…
It’s that time of the week again when those posts that that didn’t make the front page are listed for self induced torture for those who decide for some unfathomable reason that you must go and visit them (It must be car wreck syndrome — you know you shouldn’t look, but you have to anyway…). The scariest part is that it seems no matter how many of these I list, more still arrive – a constant Hello Kitty Hell…
Hello Kitty Nails (update)
Hello Kitty .45 Caliber Handgun
Hello Kitty Radio Controlled Truck
Hello Kitty and Disco Stormtrooper Costumes
Hello Kitty Box Cutter
Hello Kitty Swine Flu Mask
Hello Kitty eMac
Hello Kitty Jack-o-Lantern (update)
Hello Kitty Bloodfest
Hello Kitty Darth Vader Halloween Costume
Hello Kitty Halloween Tattoo
Hello Kitty Three Apples Fashion
Hello Kitty Headband Bow (update)
Hello Kitty Roller Coaster
Note: Sanrio legal counsel has contacted me because they realize that their fans are not bright enough to know what is an official Sanrio product and what is not. They didn’t feel that this would be a problem until the fans started contacting them directly, and they soon realized how painful it was to actually have to converse with a fanatic, and not even they had the patience to actually do this. As a result, they sent out a notice to me begging for me to take down my posts about guns that had the evil feline on them just so they didn’t have to ever correspond with the fanatics again. When I explained that they brought it on themselves, they pleaded that I spare them the torture that they inflict on me on a daily basis and asked me to post the following, Since I actually have a conscience, here is what they have to say:
Sanrio® has informed us that Sanrio is not involved in the manufacture or sale of Hello Kitty guns or weapons, and does not allow Hello Kitty® to be used to market guns or weapons. The items shown in this post are either digitally fabricated images or were custom-decorated without Sanrio’s permission. Sanrio alleges that creating false digitized images of Hello Kitty guns or weapons, or custom-decorating a real gun or weapon with Hello Kitty art, infringes Sanrio’s copyrights and trademarks, and may violate criminal laws.
And onto the original post…
Another week, another gun to add to the Hello Kitty gun collection. It’s more than a little disturbing that Hello Kitty guns have become so common that my reaction is “oh, another Hello Kitty gun” and no “wtf is wrong with the human race?” It won’t be too much longer that the evil feline will be able to arm her own army…
Sent in by gunlovr