What, exactly, is it with Hello Kitty fanatics, tattoos and combining things that never should be combined? (Plenty of examples for your torment). Let me introduce you to yet another one — the Hello Kitty Skuterrfly tattoo:
tattoo
Forehead Tattoo
Getting a Hello Kitty tattoo is bad, getting one right smack front and center of your forehead pretty much assures that you have – how should I say this diplomatically – lost your damn mind (my theory is that Sanrio has invented a Hello Kitty virus that makes people do things like this…):
Hello Kitty Scar
There are some things that arrive in my mailbox that are so out of bounds that I assume that it is a single crazy Hello Kitty fanatic that would do something like that. Take for example, Hello Kitty scarification. While the fact that anyone would do that in the first place is beyond comprehension, being the normal person I am, I assumed it was a one time aberration in the seam of the fabric of life since there was no way that more than one person would ever want to do something like that to herself.
Of course, I once again have greatly underestimated the fanaticism of those that worship Hello Kitty and once again had to jump back in horror when this arrived in my mailbox: Another Hello Kitty scar:
Hello Kitty Pikachu Tattoo
They just keep coming. Hello Kitty alone is reprehensible enough, but placing her on your skin with other supposedly “cute” characters just takes things to a whole new disastrous level as can be seen in this Hello Kitty Pikachu tattoo:
Hello Kitty Ankle Tattoo
It is depressing the sheer number of Hello Kitty tattoos that exist out there and doubly depressing that so many people have an uncontrollable urge to share them with me.
Hello Kitty Afro Samurai Tattoo
I don’t know which is more disturbing — that Hello Kitty tattoos actually exist or that they continue to mix and match the evil feline with other themes that make you simply say, “WTF?” That is about all that can be said for the Hello Kitty Afro Samurai Tattoo:
Hello Kitty Dracula Vampire Tattoo
Although I find it quite disturbing that Hello Kitty tattoos exist at all, the sheer number of Hello Kitty tattoos that are out there (and even more frighteningly, get sent to me) takes disturbing to a whole other level. The latest in this line of disturbing body art is the Hello Kitty Dracula tattoo:
I don’t understand what the fascination is with combining Hello Kitty with something else as a tattoo (then of course, I don’t understand combining Hello Kitty with anything, or merely Hello Kitty in herself, so I guess that makes it all a moot point anyway…) All I can say is that this tattoo is somewhat appropriate with the mix since Hello Kitty’s main goal is to suck the lifeblood of all those who happen to live with a Hello Kitty fanatic…
Of course, my wife loves it and has added it to her growing collection of tattoos that she wants (it’s now simply a matter of time before I come home to find her first tattoo which will undoubtedly lead to her entire body covered in tattoos of the evil feline). That is something that is not being looked forward to in Hello Kitty Hell at all…
Sent in by jasmine who deserves to have a Hello Kitty Dracula suck all the blood from her body for even thinking for a split second that sending this to me could ever be a good idea…
Update: When it rains, it pours…Brian (of Hello Kitty Jesus tattoo and Hello Kitty Darth Vader tattoo fame) has also recently done a Hello Kitty vampire tattoo:
Hello Kitty Hairy Foot Tattoo
Hello Kitty tattoos are disturbing. Hello Kitty tattoos on men are even more disturbing. Hello Kitty tattoos on the hairy feet of men with painted toe nails take disturbing to a new level:
I have no idea why people feel compelled to send me photos like this because there is absolutely no good that can come from showing images like this to anyone, especially me when I want to keep all my food down.
Sent in by Kat who deserves to have a boyfriend with a Hello Kitty tattoo on his hairy foot for even imagining that sending this to me would be a good idea…
Hello Kitty Darth Vader Tattoo
It was bound to happen because, as regular readers well know, this is Hello Kitty Hell and that means there is no limit when it comes to Hello Kittification. It also means that common decency is suspended and the sacrilege event of mixing Hello Kitty with other pop culture icons –which should not happen in the worst of nightmares — is common place. With a Hello Kitty Darth Vader and a Hello Kitty stormtrooper tattoo already in existence, it was only a matter of time before the Hello Kitty Darth Vader tattoo would appear:
There isn’t a lot more to say about this other than it’s wrong…just completely wrong…which, when you think about it, pretty much sums up Hello Kitty Hell in its entirety…
Sent in by tattoo artist Brian from Youngstown, Ohio (via a painting from Nick) who once again deserves the worst of the worst (and possibly a Hello Kitty tattoo of his own) for thinking in any way, shape, or form that sending this to me was a good idea…
Jesus Tattoo
It just never stops. When I listed the first set of Hello Kitty Tattoos, I naively thought that the topic wouldn’t come up again. It didn’t take long for the Hello Kitty Star Wars Storm Trooper tattoo to appear, then the Hello Kitty Batman tattoo which I, again, thought would put things to an end. But then there was the Hello Kitty zombie tattoo and then Hello Kitty zombie II tattoo. I felt those were never gong to be able to be topped until I saw the Hello Kitty scarification which pretty much clinched the title in my opinion, but alas, things always get worse in Hello Kitty Hell…
I know you read the title of this post and were shaking your head in disbelief even before you looked at what I have written. You thought that I was exaggerating to draw you into the blog because there is no way in Hell (Hello Kitty or otherwise) that anyone would ever get a Hello Kitty Jesus tattoo. Hello Kitty fanatics are wacko, but there is a line even they will not cross, right? See, I have had that delusion too, but it always proves to be wrong because fanatics of the evil feline don’t know what a line looks like that shouldn’t be crossed. Thus, the Hello Kitty Jesus tattoo:
No problem, I’m more than happy to wait a few minutes while you clean up the mess on your computer screen and keyboard before writing more. Take your time and make sure that all food and drink have been expelled from your stomach before attempting to look again. No, it’s not a problem that you need to run to the bathroom again because while cleaning up you noticed that it really does say “Hello Kitty is my Jesus” – I’ve already been there and understand that the food just won’t stay down…
Each year I look at what Hello Kitty Hell the previous year provided and have a small glimmer of hope that things can’t get any worse. I pat myself on the back for surviving another year without gouging my eyes out with Hello Kitty forks (or spoons or chopsticks or basically any utensil since they have all been Hello Kittified) due to all the Hello Kitty that surrounds me and imagine that the worst is surely over. Then within the first two weeks of the New Year, something like this ends up in my mailbox to remind me that Hello Kitty Hell can always get worse and 2008 is going to bring unbearable amounts of Hello Kitty pain…
Sent in by tattoo artist Brian from Youngstown, Ohio who deserves the worst of the worst that Hello Kitty can offer for not only thinking for a second that it was a good idea to send this photo to me, but for also giving notice of what 2008 is going to be like in Hello Kitty Hell…